Psycho-Cybernetics - See Yourself at Your Best

Matt Furey's Super Human Success Blog

Psychological Warfare

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One of the keys to gaining a competitive advantage over an opponent is…

PRAISE.

Yes, you read that correctly.

When you’re playing a game against someone who is “on fire,” start telling the person how good he or she is, then stand back and observe.

“Man, you’re awesome.”

“You’re the best I’ve ever seen.”

“Your form is perfect.”

“You’ve got this game down to an art form.”

“You haven’t missed a single shot.”

“You’re a natural.”

“You’re so talented.”

Now, let me switch gears.

The above isn’t just the way to gain a competitive advantage in sports, it’s also the way that many well-meaning parents (and teachers) undermine children.

Praise is a trickster.

What you intend to accomplish with praise can and often does backfire.

Why?

Because it puts focus on WHO instead of WHAT.

When a person focuses inwardly in a psychological way, when a person starts thinking about WHO instead of WHAT, it is easy to lose the feel for what was working.

This is why, as a general rule, I believe you are better off acknowledging praise with one of the following:
a. silence
b. a blank stare into the distance
c. a neutral nod.

Yes, you can also say or write “thank you” – but do so with a sense of neutrality.

Does this mean praise is out and criticism is in?

Not at all.

Constructive criticism is over-rated as well (to be covered in a future lesson).

But when you praise, make it about the tangibles that a person can latch onto. You cannot latch onto “you’re a natural.” In fact, telling someone he is a natural gives the person room to rest.

Rest, by the way, is not what makes someone great.

Work, physical as well as psychological, is what makes someone good.

Work is tangible. You have to DO something.

Being told you’re a natural undermines a person because he or she is being told that the skill doesn’t come from WORK – it was given to you.

Oh, lucky me. I’m a natural. See how good I am. The coach just told me I’m the best.

Plop.

Meanwhile, someone with less talent, someone who is less natural, passes you as you’re stuck in your own head, thinking about how “blessed” you are.

If you want to be blessed, then put together an incredible work ethic; one that includes the physical, psychological and spiritual sides of the equation.

See it. Feel it. Do it.

Matt Furey

By the way, you’ll notice I never praise you for being on this list. I never write to tell you how awesome you are. I never write to say that you’re so smart because you’re one of the few who “gets it.” There are many reasons for this, a few of which are contained in today’s email. You’ll find others in Theatre of the Mind – the best-selling audio program I did with Nightingale-Conant.

Loser Pitcher Wins World Series Ring

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To the fans and media in Boston, their pitcher was a bust.

He couldn’t win in the postseason and he couldn’t beat the Yankees.

On top of that, adding insult to infamy, this pitcher was getting $30 million a year.

And logic has it, if you’re getting $30 million per year, you are a loser if you don’t beat the Yankees, or win when it counts, in the playoffs.

In a playoff game a couple weeks ago, this loser pitcher didn’t even last two innings against the Yankees.

The ruthless fans showed their love, sung to the sound of “Booooo”as he walked off the field.

This morning, these same fans are in love. Their loser pitcher is now a hero.

He went from 0-9 in the postseason, to winning three games without a loss. Most importantly, he was the winning pitcher in the clinching game of the World Series.

He deserved the MVP for his efforts, but those things matter not when everyone knows you’re “the Man.”

David Price, rose from the fire of the abyss and transformed himself and his team into world champions – and did so within a few short weeks.

The talent and skill to win in the playoffs was there all along – but something was activated inside of Mr. Price after the pounding he received from the Yankees, and the Boston fans.

Coaches and players and the player himself can talk about a change in mechanics or some other physical detail all they want – but no change on the outside ever happens without one taking place on the inside.

As an observer, you can look into the eyes of a pitcher, quarterback or leader in any field, and you can tell who the warrior is and who’s the Nervous Nelly.

Becoming who Price was over the past couple weeks, comes from mixing your intention with your imagination. Not one or the other.

Both.

It also comes from being willing to move through the pain, to accept it as part of the process. Growth without pain (or pangs) rarely exists, regardless of what level of success you’ve already attained.

Price wasn’t just a pitcher in the Major Leagues. He was also a former Cy Young winner.

He was far from being a loser – but was considered one because he didn’t win when the fans thought it mattered most.

Now he’s proven to himself and the fans, at least for now, that he’s a winner – and a deserving one at that.

David Price’s monumental turnaround, proves to all of us, once again, that failure is never final and that when we are stuck in the deepest canyon, we are simultaneously in perfect position to scale the world’s tallest mountain.

See it. Feel it. Be it.

Matt Furey

The Price Ain’t Right in Boston

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A few days ago I was reading about the Boston press, and how there’s no love between them and lefty pitcher David Price.

The press and fans detest his woeful record against the New York Yankees, whom he pitched against last night.

Not surprisingly, Price was defensive when answering questions – just as the great Ted Williams was.

And last night, Price got shellacked once again, which will undoubtedly lead to more bad press today, as well as more bad vibes from the fans.

Now let’s analyze this in a Psycho-Cybernetics sort of way.

You have a great pitcher, a former Cy Young award winner. He’s being paid well over 100 million dollars to robotically perform at his best, regardless of whom he plays, regardless of when or where, too.

And if he doesn’t do the job, i.e. he isn’t the robot the fans and the media expect him to be, the way to fix the situation is through condemnation and humiliation.

How’s it working out so far?

It’s not.

If you want David Price to pitch well against the Yankees, instead of reminding him before each outing, how he NEVER pitches
well against this team, why not remind him of all the games he pitched in and won on the way to winning a Cy Young?

Why not take him back in time to an outing, even an inning, against the Yankees, wherein he pitched well?

Why not help him OUT of the corner?

Instead of doing so, the media pushes him further into it while simultaneously expecting a different result?

And what they get is more of what they say they don’t want… while expecting a different result, a different Price to show up.

Insanity.

Give me fifteen minutes with David Price and he’ll stride to the mound with confidence – against the Yankees or anyone else.

I’ll put him through a high-octane Theatre of the Mind, reminding him of his greatness, and he will begin to perform better and better.

But when he comes back to Tampa?

Uggh, I’ll be rooting for Price’s former team.

See it. Feel it. Be it.

Matt Furey

It Hurts, I Know and I Understand

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Back in February, my son’s senior year of high school baseball began, and as the saying goes, “all bets were off.”

I don’t know what it is about this game, which no parent should EVER allow his or her son to play. unless, of course, you want
to teach your child how to overcome mistakes and feelings of failure – which he will probably NEVER encounter in any other area of life. (Sarcasm intended).

The team went 24-4 and finished in the Final Four at the state championships – which is to say – they were doing great… until they LOST.

Yes, I still HATE losing – even when it’s not me playing the game.

By the way, one of the worst things you can say to someone after a loss is “congratulations.”

Hearing “congratulations”after you lose in the semifinals or finals, sucks beyond all rational comprehension.

It really does.

The very BEST thing you can say to a player after a loss is….

“It hurts, I know and I understand.”

Then give the player a hug and let him know you love him and are proud of him, regardless.

Back in the early 1990’s, when I was learning about the power of deep breathing at an entirely new level, I spoke to my instructor, Nancy, about how strange I felt leaving my old home and moving into a new one.

I mentioned how I felt a sense of loss, even though I couldn’t wait to move out of the old and into the new.

Nancy nodded and replied: “Anytime you make a change and leave someone or something behind, the emotion of grief is present. You may suppress it, but it’s there.”

Is there grief when a season ends? When a child graduates? When a daughter gets married and moves on?

Is there grief when your team loses the World Series, or the Super Bowl?

You better believe it.

This is why you see grown men cry after losing a pivotal game. It’s not because they are cry babies or can’t take it. It’s because they are human beings feeling an overpowering emotion.

Getting past the grief is necessary, though, as it’s pretty hard to operate when you’re filled with sadness.

The fastest ways to assuage the pain and rid yourself of the grief and sadness are as follows:

1. Breathe deeply and let the feelings come up. As you continue to breathe, they will dissipate.

2. Talk to others who understand and are compassionate.

3. Write about it. Let your feelings pour onto a piece of paper – preferably by hand.

4. Do something physical – such as walking, punching a heavy bag, stretching, etc.

5. Most powerful of all, look for and find the positive memories stored in your brain or “personal cloud.”

Download those memories. Relive them. Re-experience them. Make the memories come alive again – and use them to step into the future once again, willing to take risks with confidence and courage.

As you do so, realize that mistakes and failures are there for a reason – and the reasons are almost always a huge positive, as well as an unseen and currently unimagined benefit to you in the long run,

Discover how to do all of the above at a superhuman level by reading Psycho-Cybernetics – or by investing in the more advanced course entitled Zero Resistance Living.

And it that’s not enough, then enroll in my Theater of the Mind Facebook group.

All for now,

Matt Furey

P.S. Also, if you want to learn how to write emails such as this one, and dramatically improve your business, then go here.

Expect Nothing, Achieve Much

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About four years ago, before I started a tai chi class with my instructor, I thought I would give him a gift.

Twas a Furey fan favorite entitled, Expect to Win – Hate to Lose.

I didn’t think I could go wrong giving this book to my teacher.

He looks at it, pauses, then says, “You know, if I were writing this book, I would have titled it….”

He proceeded to tell me why the title wasn’t very good, in his viewpoint, and gave a couple reasons to justify his opinion.

I stood a few feet away and listened, then we walked to the center of the floor and began our lesson.

No harm – no foul, even though this was definitely not the norm for how someone responds when given a gift, especially a gift you wrote yourself.

Over the years I’ve pondered this situation a few times, especially as my thinking evolved on a number of topics, including the concept of expectation or “expecting to win.”

I’m now of the opinion that sometimes it feels as though it’s a good idea to “expect” the best – but more often than not, for many people much of the time, having high expectations leads to the worst results.

People who set big goals, who think big, who follow all the procedures and advice of so many of the self-development gurus
of this day and age, are going to be let down in a BIG way. They are going to be profoundly disappointed.

They’re not just going to be let down, however, because they can’t achieve their dreams or goals.

They most certainly can.

The let down is more a result of using self-help in the wrong way, of being misled to think you need to be unnatural to attain a big goal.

And when the unnatural actions and ideas don’t yield the results you EXPECTED, you end up feeling CRUSHED.

This is most definitely the case in sports, in career advancement, in writing, in selling, in rearing your children – and the grandbaby of them all – politics.

When you expect to win and you’re victorious – all is well in your world.

But when you expet to win and you lose – especially when you lose to someone who supposedly had no chance to beat you – you’re not only crushed – you’re probably depressed.

I’ve watched this play out in sports such as baseball so often it’s practically guaranteed to happen when you least expect it.

Two years in a row my son’s high school baseball team was ranked in the top ten in the state. In the first round of districts they faced a team with a record south of .500 – and I mean, way south.

Both years they expected to win. Both times they lost.

Uh-oh. Now what do you do?

As a result of my tai chi practice, as well as closely observing what is and isn’t true, based upon results, not pie-in-the-sky theory, I can tell you that the sequel to Expect to Win – Hate to Lose will not be…

Expect to Win – Volume Two.

Instead, it’ll be something along the lines of Expect Nothing and Achieve More.

Yet, the above assumes I’m going to write a sequel – yet, as of now, I have no expectation of doing so.

Does the above mean that I don’t believe in goals or goal setting?

What it means is I believe in goals and goal setting that is natural, that causes flow instead of fear, that causes success even
when that is not what you’re focused on.

Setting goals that scare you is NOT NATURAL.

Neither is massive action or sitting around working on changing your limiting beliefs.

There is a naturally just so to life and to living.

There is a rhythm.

When you force success you cause a blow out somewhere down the road.

When success is a natural extension of who you are – you will live the life others dream about.

As for yourself, you still have to pinch your cheek from time to time and ask, “Is this for real? Did I really do all of THIS? Unreal.”

Think of it this way, in baseball, if you approached your pitcher before a big game and told him you expected him to throw a no-hitter, or a perfect game – you would most assuredly screw him up.

The same would happen to the golfer whom you told to hit a hole in one as he was teeing off.

But if you focus this athlete on the small – he may surprise himself and win it all.

Matt Furey

P.S. For coaching opportunities – go here…

The Cubs’ Winning Secret

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Early this morning, the Chicago Cubs accomplished a seemingly unattainable goal that they were cursed and hexed from ever achieving.

The Billy Goat Curse was lifted and Cubs’ fans the world over can now celebrate as they exhale. Yes, 108 years of agony are no more.

With their exhale, Cubs’ fans are partaking in at least half of the “secret sauce” for winning the BIG ONE.

What’s the other half?

Well, that would be the inhale.

What?

You’re telling me that inhaling and exhaling are part of the Cubs’ secret?

That is correct.

In fact, I’ve written about the powers of deep breathing exercises in many of my products over the years – and for one reason, the exercises work “miracles.”

Just by learning to tap into the power of your breath, your entire experience of life can be dramatically and inarguably altered for the better.

I continue to write about the glories of deep breathing exercises because they are proven to be incredibly effective at helping a person improve his or her life in ANY AREA.

Before the start of Game Six, I listened to two radio announcers talking about what the Cubs needed to do strategically to play at their best. One announcer told the other, “They need to breathe deeply.”

“Well, haha, if they win tonight doing that, what are you going to say before Game Seven?”

“Same thing.”

Dr. Tom Hanson, author of Heads Up Baseball (an updated and expanded edition is coming out next month), told me this morning that he overheard the players in the dugout discussing staying calm under pressure by… you guessed it… breathing deeply.

Hmmm, could it be for real?

Well, let’s look at this: A few months ago I read an article that asked the question, “Where does all the fat go when you lose weight?”

Turns out that a large portion of excess fat is exhaled into the atmosphere.

Truth is, if you want to be physically stronger and more focused in any type of athletic or martial arts endeavor, you tap into a new level of ability when you understand the mechanics of deep breathing.

The same holds true, psychologically speaking, when taking an exam, giving a speech, writing a report or performing before others. Not only will you feel more grounded and relaxed while engaged, you’ll probably do far better as well.

From experience we know that when we withhold our breath we perform less powerfully and less gracefully.

This is why it’s vitally important to remember the following phrase:

Your Breath is Your POWER.

Taking charge of every breath you will ever take is part of an ongoing journey that is calling out to you.

Mastery of your breath is a lifetime endeavor. On a daily basis you scan your body for physical tension and explore your mind for psychological roadblocks, all of which can be released through guided deep breathing exercises.

I’m looking forward to covering these breathing exercises in great detail at my forthcoming seminar in February, wherein I show how they apply to the art and science of writing.

For now, hats off to the Cubs for using this secret so effectively.

Breathe it, Feel it, Do it!

Matt Furey
mattfurey.com
psycho-cybernetics.com

P.S. Listen to the Nightingale-Conant best-selling audio book, Theater of the Mind, by going to
audible.com. Also, be sure to pick up a copy of Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded at amazon.com

Prove It

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A week ago today I went to the bowling alley for the first time in approximately 12 years – in part to demonstrate to a client how visualization in action works.

The last time I bowled was in China, wherein I hit my best-ever mark of 181, with an all-or-nothing style of throwing strikes with minimal technical skill. When I bowl, I view my mission as straightforward and simplistic – cause an eruption when the ball whacks the pins.

From the first time I picked up a bowling ball to the present, I’ve played in less than 100 games and have received zero instruction regarding technique, set-up, approach, how to hold the ball or how to deliver a hook.

In fact, until last week, the thought of taking up the sport with gusto and enthusiasm never occurred to me. I was completely oblivious to the obvious; people actually purchase their own balls and shoes and bags and compete all over the whirld in this sport. It’s no different than golf, baseball and all these other endeavors people are attracted and addicted to playing.

Yet, my perceptions were dramatically altered when I called my friend, Will, after playing three games, to give him the report. The first game was a throwaway; a warmup. I didn’t even crack the three-figure mark, bowling a measly 94.

Then I got seriously involved, psychologically and physiologically speaking.

I took my time and focused on my preparatory alignments, getting into a tai chi type of position wherein I started focusing on my feet and worked northward. Additionally and perhaps most importantly, I formed a gigantic mental image of what I wanted: a strike.

I pictured every single pin being shattered into submission as I breathed life into the core of my physicality.

Then I glissaded across the floor and unleashed a torrential outpouring of “fury.”

What a difference a thought makes – especially a high-voltage thought such as the one I was ruminating on in my imagination.

KA-BOOM!


I threw six strikes in the second game and five in the third. That’s eleven strikes in total – after having only one in the first game.

Was I visualizing in the first game? Was I using the powers of my imagination? Was I breathing deeply?

Most certainly not the way I was in games dos and tres.

I was going through the motions and mechanics of what I thought would work. Yet, the reality is, at the end of the day, technique will only get you part of the way to your goal. It won’t take you all the way. As Albert Einstein reported, “Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.”

In my conversation with Will after the games, when he heard I bowled a 176, he remarked, “And that was with a house ball and shoes that 1,000 people have already worn. Just think what you’ll do when you get your own custom drilled ball, your own shoes….”

Huh?

Will planted an idea in my imagination I’d never considered before. What would happen if I got my own ball and shoes? What about getting some instruction, as well?

I can tell you from experience, and from what I’ve observed of coaches in all sports and physical endeavors – any instruction I receive will be entirely physical. It’ll be all about the mechanics, the physics, the structure of the ball and the dynamics at play. If the psycho-physical part of the game is covered at all, I’ll be delighted as well as surprised.

Most coaches actually believe that excellence is simply a matter of proper mechanics and genetics.

Mechanics and genetics are factors that may influence your success but they are NOT all they’re cracked up to be, either.

Epi-genetics can trump genetics in cases that appear hopeless. And when it comes to mechanics, although helpful and useful, consider this: My friend, Will, is a mollydooker (Australian for Lefty) and he bowled a perfect game (300 score) with his weight on the wrong foot when he released the ball.

Then he got taught the “right” way and was never the same until he went back to doing it the way that came naturally for him.

This doesn’t mean that mechanics coaches are always wrong – but they are almost always off target with their body-only approach. When you make the physical body the most significant aspect of what is going on – you’ve neglected the bowling ball shaped apparatus on the top of your neck that really holds the keys to the kingdom.

If this is not the case, then how do people without hands learn to play the piano? How do people without arms learn to shoot the bow and arrow? How do people with stumps for all four limbs learn to wrestle?

It’s an intangible, mostly indecipherable quality that is not easily quantifiable. Call it heart. Call it desire. Call it intention. Call it imagination. Call it will power. Call it all of the above.

Whatever you choose to name it – you cannot see it – but you can most definitely observe the uncanny results it creates.

Be it. Do it. Live it.

Matt Furey
psycho-cyb.com
mattfurey.com

P.S. Make sure you retrieve a copy of Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded – then begin the implementation of your visualization skills in a positive manner by working on a game or skill with numbers that prove the techniques are working.

The Winningest Coaches – What They Believe

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There’s a familiar pattern here.
Many years ago I read about a book Vince Lombardi had in his personal library. It was dog-eared, hi-lighted and filled with hand-written notes.Lombardi used this book to help himself coach the Green Bay Packers to the first two Super Bowl titles.

Monte Clark, then an assistant coach with the Miami Dolphins, used this same book to help head coach Don Shula go 17-0 and win the Super Bowl with the Miami Dolphins.

The legendary Jim Brown, arguably the greatest NFL running back of all times, spoke about this book in an HBO documentary, Jim Brown: All American.

And then there’s Augie Garrido, the winningest coach in college baseball history. He’s won five College World Series titles – with two different teams. He’s guided young men who nobody wanted and helped them become extraordinary ball players. He’s a fan of this same book, too.

On page 75 in Augie’s book, Life is Yours to Win, he writes about the influence Psycho-Cybernetics has had on him and his teams.

He also states how a key element of Psycho-Cybernetics is championed in the movie, For Love of the Game, starring Kevin Costner, who played the pitcher, Billy Chapel, who at 40 years of age, is so focused and “in the moment” that he doesn’t realize until the 8th inning that he’s throwing a perfect game.

Coach Garrido writes: “One of the techniques Chapel uses to stay focused is to tell himself, “Clear the mechanism.”

“This is a phrase from Psycho-Cybernetics. Clearning the mechanism is a method for emptying the mind of fear and other distractions. It’s managing the moment by mentally slowing it down.”

Clearing the mechanism is clearing the brain of fear and other distractions. It’s letting go of worry, self-doubt and other concerns. It’s living in the moment – one breath at a time.

How do you clear the mechanism, the brain?

You mentally picture a calculator before you. It has numbers on the screen. You push the clear button so you can do a new
computation.

You could also picture a computer screen before you. You clear the screen by seeing it dissolve before you.

As you do this, you breathe deeply and center yourself. And then you go about your business, doing what you’ve set out to do.

There are many others ways to do this in Zero Resistance Living – the advanced program on Psycho-Cybernetics.

The key, though, is training yourself to live in the moment, to feel good everyday, no matter what. It’s learning how to use your positive as well as negative past to launch yourself forward.

Wouldn’t it be great if nothing from the past that was supposedly negative is there to do anything but help you succeed at a higher level?

And this is true, if you know the techniques in Zero Resistance Living. I encourage you to give the program a whirl, so it can give your life a positive whirl in the right direction.

Yours,

Matt Furey

P.S. By the way, in November, Psycho-Cybernetics, Updated and Expanded, will be available, containing a foreword and afterword from ‘yours truly’ – as well as commentary throughout.

Donald Trump’s Presidential Genes

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Ever hear someone claim that the reason for another person’s success is “genetic.”

Word is that Donald Trump claimed genetics to be the reason for his business success.

Really?

So you either have the right genes for success – or you don’t. And if you don’t – you’re scrooood – (rhymes with Scrooge}.

Here’s what I believe: Success IS genetic – and you have the capability within to “turn on” latent or dormant genes – or to use the ones that are already on.

You turn your success genes on the same way you activate the success mechanism in your brain – by the positive use of your IMAGINATION mixed with positive FEELINGS.

Keep in mind, if you choose not to use your imagination for the positive, then by dafault you’re using it for the negative. Mix negative mental imagery with negative feelings and you get negative results. Mix positive images with positive emotions and you activate positive realities.

Pretty simple formula.

Sure, there’s “work” that goes into the success formula – but no work ever gets done without imagining it getting
done first.

Can anyone and everyone imagine and become shortstop for the New York Yankees?

Of course not.

Yet, oddly enough, Derek Jeter, the future hall-of-famer who played that position for the Yankees for nearly 20 years, has a book called The Life You Imagine.

Interesting, isn’t it? At a young age Jeter told his parents he was going to play shortstop for the Yankees. His parents encouraged this dream in him. They made no comments to him about being too small, not having the genes, etc.

The young Jeter went so far as to hang a Yankees jersey from the back of his bedroom door – and each night before sleep he’d lie there and imagine his future reality.

Did these “imaginings” set in motion or cause the young Jeter to “do the work” necessary to become the Derek Jeter that Yankees’ fans admire so much?

Of course.

No one trains, works, writes, paints, sings, dances, swims, runs, walks, eats or makes love without imagining it first.

You may not think you imagine something before you do it – but if you stop yourself long enough to examine your process – you’ll see that you do.

The same goes with failure.

All of us have seen someone drop a glass or plate, or fall down – then exclaim, “I knew i was going to do that.”

Okay, how’d you know?

You knew because you saw a picture in your mind of it happening – and you didn’t take the time to change images before the slip happened.

The negative image you pictured became a reality.

Now, the billion doll-ar question:

Does Donald Trump have the genes to become President of the United States?

Perhaps, but I don’t think he really, truly imagines “with FEELING” himself holding that position – so I don’t see him ever sitting behind a desk in the Oval Office.

But forget about politics for a moment and ponder where you want to be, want you want to do or who you want to be.

Do so with positive feelings.

If you’re willing to do the above religiously, I’m willing to promise you one thing: you’ll start doing the things that move you in the direction of what you’re picturing.

How close you get to what you want depends on how often you mix imagination with emotion and action.

Here endeth today’s lesson.

Matt Furey
author of Theatre of the Mind

P.S. I’m looking at having a POWER of IMAGINATION seminar this all. You like the idea? If so, make sure you prep yourself by getting my Theatre of the Mind program. Here’s what one reader recently said about the program:

“Theatre of the Mind gives the most incredible boost to the world of CREATIVE imagination. Visualizing images and such works, but the examples you gave really turbo-charge the experiences in the mind – and change your outside circumstances much more smoothly and rapidly.  Incredible.”
D.H. – Des Moines, Iowa

Biggest Mistake Coaches Make

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 The other day I gave my daughter a tennis lesson.

I decided to do so after watching her get a private lesson from a very good coach.

As I watched her lesson, though, I made a few mental notes on what to work on. There was one mistake that she repeatedly made – so I devised a way to correct it for her, within 5 minutes, and do so without ever telling her she was doing anything wrong.

What?

Now, that’s a pretty big idea, especially when I’m not a tennis coach and for all “practical” purposes, am not qualified to give instruction on the game.

Okay, if I’m “not qualified” – how’d the session go with my daughter?

Well, first let me tell you what I didn’t do – EVER, in the entire lesson.

First, I gave zero instruction on mechanics, how to hit the ball or anything remotely close.

Second, I never corrected her mechanics in any way.

Third, I believed I could have her hitting the ball correctly within a few minutes with this “mental game” method.

So what happened?

In less than five minutes, she was stroking the ball better than ever.

Now, how could that be? Am I joking?

Not at all.

Here’s the trick: People make mistakes all the time when they do something new. And they’re told by coaches that in order to create “muscle memory” they need to repeat their technique 2,000 times in a row in order to have a repeatable movement pattern that’s on auto-pilot.

This is totally false and misleading.

Far too many coaches and teachers still don’t realize that mistakes are NOT a bad thing – so long as you learn from them and use them as feedback to guide you to a BETTER – not a perfect – performance.

IF you continually point out mistakes – you cause the person to become a bit more tense and a bit more inhibited. More tension and more inhibition lead to reduced performance.

So the key is to reduce tension and reduce inhibition – to remove the fear and frustration of making mistakes. To actually VALUE your mistakes. To practice without pressure so that you can think and make adjustments.

As a coach, if you don’t condemn mistakes, neither will the player.

If you don’t have something to say after every shot – the silence will do more to help the athlete than your barking about technique and mechanics.

You’ve got to trust that the player isn’t an idiot, that if you know when to leave her alone – she’ll actually turn out better.

You’ve got to know what not to say.

You’ve got to know how to give the athlete the control so she can make the adjustments on her own and figure it out herself.

And the amazing thing is you don’t even have to know the game in order to do this.

Let me tell you, my daughter was smiling and having a blast. She was loving the game more than ever.

Her Dad was a genius. How’d he know all this stuff to help her get better so fast?

What I know is how to “Defeat the Failure Mechanism.”

That’s right. The Failure Mechanism.

If you don’t know how to shut the feelings of frustration, fear and inhibition OFF – no amount of positive thinking will help you.

Why?

Because the failure mechanism will undermine all the positive stuff you’re trying to do.

As parents, coaches and teachers, many of us unknowingly contribute to the inhibition, fear and frustration of those we love. It’s sad but true.

I did so myself.

Until I discovered the secrets of defeating the failure mechanism.

Once I had these keys in mind and began implementing them, I was no longer the same coach, teacher or parent.

I’d like to pass these keys on to you. If interested let me know.

Yours,

Matt Furey

P.S. Remember, you can save $40 off the price of Theatre of the Mind if you order NOW. It’s the best CD program out there – and was created without a bit of self-criticism on my part. It was all FLOW. Listen to this program and it’ll connect you to the Force of FLOW as well.

Free PDF of Theatre of the Mind Newsletter

Free PDF of Theatre of the Mind Newsletter

Hello and welcome to Psycho-Cybernetics.com - the official site for the original (and expanded) teachings of Dr. Maxwell Maltz, author of the 35 million copy best-seller, Psycho-Cybernetics. I’m Matt Furey, author of the best-selling Nightingale-Conant audio book, Maxwell Maltz’ Theatre of the Mind.

When you subscribe to our Psycho-Cybernetics emails, I will immediately send you an email containing a FREE PDF ($100 value) of my Theatre of the Mind Masters Newsletter called Defeating the Failure Mechanism, which also features a Dr. Maltz piece, When Positive Thinking Doesn't Work. This highly regarded newsletter will show you how to apply the suggestions contained within it into your own life… and make changes for the BETTER!

Best,
Matt Furey
President, Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation

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