Jack was really good at majoring in minor things.
He was superb at focusing on various aspects of himself that were, for the most part, irrelevant to whether or not he would get tangible results he could point to and say, “See what I did?”
Here are some examples of what Jack was doing:
* Instead of learning to picture what he wanted and focusing on it – he learned to “think positive.”
* Instead of forming a clear image of who he wants to be – he focused on changing “limiting beliefs.”
* Instead of observing where he is in relation to his goals – he learned to stand before the mirror and say, “I like myself. I love myself and doggone it, people dig me.”
* Instead of using what I call “your natural success formula,” the one that you’re actually batting 1,000 with, he learned to write and speak affirmations that begin with “I AM.”
I AM THIS and I AM THAT.
These methods proved to be ineffective in accomplishing anything for Jack – other than temporarily making himself feel comfortable in his own skin.
Alrighty then, you feel comfortable being yourself, but what do you have to show for it? Nothing.
On the other hand, when Jack learned to focus the way I taught him to focus, he instantly felt good about himself, even though there was zero attention on the “self” whatsoever. Moreover, at the end of his day, he accomplished something that he could point to and say, “Look what I did.”
As I told Jack, “When it comes to most self-development, there’s an abundance of focus on the SELF and almost none on the
DEVELOPMENT.”
He now knows this to be true – and has the tangible results to prove it.
If you’re tired of all the positive thinking mantras, the reality-contradicting I AM statements, and all the boomerangs that come with working on your limiting beliefs, then you’ll love the products offered on the Psycho-Cybernetics website.
Moreover, you and I may even hit it off in grand style as I take you to the next level with my elite coaching. That’s the coaching where I take you from majoring in minor things to getting major things accomplished.
Simplify your success-generating process.
Eliminate all the non-essential fluffy feel good stuff and utilize the material that gets you results that GO – results that make you feel good, even though you’re not even focused on it.
Make sense?
Then…
Let’s Do It!
Matt Furey
The Worst Question in Self-Development
The first time someone asked me the worst question in self-development was back in 1990.
My first thought was, “What a creepy thing to ask? What do you want to know that for?”
Over the years, I’ve heard more and more people asking this question and my opinion of it hasn’t changed.
What’s the question?
It is this: “And how did/does that make you feel?”
Various forms and guises of this question are now prevalent in everywhere, including in professional sports, during their post-game interviews.
Reporter: “How did you feel when you hit the homerun? How did you feel when you scored your first touchdown? How did you feel when you sunk the game winning shot?”
Everything is about feelings with almost no insights into the “inner game” or strategy of the athlete.
Good questions are almost completely absent from interviews today, much less useful coaching.
Instead of discovering what someone was thinking, which may include his or her feelings, reporters, teachers and coaches isolate the one thing they think matters most. And the truth is the one thing they think matters the most usually matters the least.
Feelings are a factor in properly positioning your mind for success, but when it comes to overcoming adversity, to rising above deep difficulties, to accomplishing a goal, the caveman mentality often works best.
Look at the images the caveman drew upon the wall for his fellow cavemen to see. Listen to him speak about what he drew.
See those buffalo? Those deer? Tomorrow we go hunt and bring home. You want? Raaaaaaaahhhhh.
The goal is established. Sights are now set. The only thing left is action.
At no time does the caveman ask, “And how does tomorrow’s hunt make you feel?”
When you visualize, you mentally picture your goal. You also imagine and pretend you can hear the sounds and feel the feelings of getting what you want. All three of these senses are important; so are the others that I didn’t mention. But feelings are not driving the bus. Images playing within the mind of the bus driver dictate where the rig goes.
Your self-image is most important. It is the blueprint for where you’re going in life. Your feelings are a factor, but they are far from being the most important one.
Never answer the question, “And how does that make you feel?”
Focus on your mental images and you’ll get along much better.
Matt Furey
Do the Thing – Feel the Power
“I write only when inspiration strikes. Fortunately it strikes every morning at nine o’clock sharp.” – W. Somerset Maugham
When you look at the above quote, you may get the notion that inspiration strikes first, and that it is followed by action.
Because I’ve written plenty of books, newsletters and emails over the years, I can tell you that inspiration can strike BEFORE or AFTER you begin. Inspiration doesn’t necessarily precede action.
I have encountered this same truth in my training in various sports and martial arts, in learning a foreign language, and a plethora of other activities.
When I was training for the Honolulu marathon in 1990, there were days I wanted to run so much that I overdid it. There were days that I dreaded the running, until I got going. After 100 meters, I was ready to roll. And then there were days that I had to remind myself of “the dream” to keep myself going.
That’s the way it works.
Somedays you’re inspired before you run. Somedays you aren’t. But when you have an appointment with yourself and you are going to “do the thing” regardless of whether or not you feel inspired, a funny thing happens. Your brain and nervous system light up and you begin to feel inspired about what you’re doing.
No professional writer would ever claim, other than in jest, that he or she always feels inspired before getting started. But once the writer’s hands and fingers begin to move and words appear upon the blank sheet or screen, the brain releases dopamine and serotonin, and the writer begins to feel great, perhaps even inspired.
The truth is as follows;
Sometimes you feel inspired to write before you begin.
Sometimes you feel inspired after you begin.
Either way, inspiration doesn’t truly strike until someone and something moves.
Most importantly, it’s the daily doing at a specific time that makes the difference between the good and the great.
Set a specific time to do something on a regular basis and stick to that schedule. Some days you’ll be inspired to engage; other days you won’t. Engage anyway.
Don’t look for inspiration.
Do the thing and the inspiration will come of its own accord.
Matt Furey
P.S. Click on Psycho-Cybernetics for more information about our products and services.
Goal Setting Frustration
Someone once asked me, “Where do you want to be in 20 years?”
“20 years?” I replied. “Are you serious? How about asking me where I see myself at the end of today?”
There’s a fundamental disconnect in goal setting that leads to deep frustration, fear and self-doubt. This disconnect unwittingly teaches you to be miserable until you reach a certain milestone.
Once you reach that milestone, THEN you can be happy.
Sorry, but happiness doesn’t work that way.
Happiness is something you practice on the way to your goal. There is no goal that, once achieved, will install happiness as a habit.
Setting a bunch of long-range targets is a waste of time for almost everyone who does it. After a year or two, when you notice that none of your targets are being reached, you not only lose interest in the goals you set, but you begin to think that you’re a failure when it comes to goal setting.
If this scenario looks and feels familiar, it’s not your fault. You failed because you were playing in a rigged game with the wrong system.
The game sounds great, but it’s rigged because your chances of having the same goals for 20 years are about as slim as Minnesota Fats.
Yes, there is a much better way to set and achieve goals. There’s a much easier arena for you to play in – and WIN.
And it has nothing to do with imposing a new set of beliefs upon yourself.
It has nothing to do with figuring out what your negative thoughts are, or devising a strategy to make all of them positive.
It has nothing to do with thinking big, or setting goals that scare you.
It has nothing to do with the ridiculous maxim of getting out of your comfort zone. Do you really think that a star athlete who is “in the zone” is uncomfortable? Hell no. He’s in the comfort zone – and that’s why he’s playing so well.
Additionally, this way of setting and achieving goals has nothing to do with the concept of taking MASSIVE ACTION.
Yes, I am serious.
I’ll go so far as to say there is no such thing as massive action. It’s a myth.
Look at reality.
You only get one breath at a time. You only get to take one step at a time. You only get to live one second at a time.
Color reality massive all you want – but this only causes more fast-twitch anxiety, nervousness and frustration.
Here’s something you may not have realized, even if you’ve read Dr. Maxwell Maltz classic best-seller, Psycho-Cybernetics, numerous times. None of the concepts I blasted above, were favorably mentioned in his book.
If you think that Dr. Maltz wrote about the importance of getting out of your comfort zone or taking massive action, then please send me the passage so I can make a correction. But the fact is you aren’t going to find those passages.
Nor will you find Dr. Maltz telling you to think big or to set goals that scare you.
This explains why, when I begin coaching new clients, I usually have to help them rewind their minds, to go back to the time before they began swallowing the gobbledegook. I help them go back to a time when they were succeeding without thinking too much about it.
I’m currently in the process of interviewing prospective coaching clients – people who want to get the real goods on successful living – and go to the NEXT LEVEL.
If you are one of those people who wants to go beyond where you currently are without having to fabricate 20 years of your future, if you want to follow a simple approach to successful living that gives you results you can look at and examine on a daily basis, then go to my coaching page and fill out an application. If it turns out that we are a fit, then I will get back with you.
See it. Feel it. Be it.
Best,
Matt Furey
Clearing Negative Emotions Fast
As you’re probably aware, almost two months ago, my father passed away at the age of 97. Even though I realized his departure from this earth was imminent, when the finality of the news hit, it definitely shook me up.
Thankfully, I had a number of healing routines I could follow. I could pray. I could meditate. And I could practice Theatre of the Mind.
But there was something else I did every single evening, and it cleared away the negative emotions, without any effort whatsoever. What I practiced every night is a type of moving meditation called Dao Zou, I learned more than 15 years ago.
When I first learned this system, I had no idea that one day I would be using it and teaching it to help people overcome negative emotions, including the emotions of grief and sadness. But I’m sure glad I had this knowledge in my tool box because it made a huge shift in my emotional state whenever the seemingly unshakeable feelings would surface.
Each night when I began, I didn’t feel up to the challenge, but I recognized how to overcome my own resistance to the routine by focusing on taking small steps. Not big ones. Nothing major. Just a few steps in reverse.
After a few steps I would tell myself, “Just give me 100 steps.” When I had almost reached 100 steps I was eager for another 100, and so on.
At 500 steps I felt so good I could have stopped, but the urge to keep going, the internal impetus to transcend and rise above it all was telling me to keep going.
Keep going, I did, until I reached 2,000 steps. Then I jumped in the sauna for at least 20 minutes.
The sauna alone is great for toughening yourself up mentally – but I don’t recommend doing it before purging the grief and sadness from your system.
Each evening, after Dao Zou and the sauna, I would go to bed feeling so much better. But the next day, at some point, another layer of grief would emerge.
What to do now?
How about the same thing you did yesterday?
How about you rinse and repeat what works, realizing there is no “one time fixes all” approach in the self-development or spiritual world.
Brush your teeth daily. Shower daily. And clean your mind daily with some form of meditation, prayer or visualization – or all of the above, if necessary.
After 10 evenings of daily Dao Zou, I woke up one morning with an unmistakable feeling of inner peace about my father’s passing. What a glorious moment.
The results I got this time around, proved to me once again, that Dao Zou is much more than a health and fitness program. It’s a healing program that emphasizes moving, instead of trying to sit your way to feeling better, which doesn’t work.
Dao Zou can help clear the mind-body of sadness and grief, as well as worry, self-doubt and fear.
It can also help you learn other skills faster than anything I have ever seen or witnessed. It truly is the Ultimate in Moving Meditation as it catapults you into an incredibly vibrant state of consciousness.
Now you can claim your copy of Dao Zou at a ridiculously low amount. And if you prefer, you can download it digitally and begin practicing almost immediately, giving you instant proof of what I’m writing about.
Discover the power of moving meditation NOW.
Claim your copy of Dao Zou.
See it. Feel it. Be it.
Matt Furey
Kicking IS the Habit
The old commercials in the 1960’s and 70’s spoke about “kicking the habit” when it came to cigarette smoking.
Framed positively, I think of kicking AS the daily habit I want in my life.
Instead of kicking a bad habit, though, I picture kicking a GOOD habit into high gear. And kicking, in and of itself, is superb exercise for brain and body.
’tis part of the reason that I love kicking. Lots and lots of kicking.
Kicking footballs, soccer balls… even basketballs.
Kicking heavy bags. Kicking weeds.
All are good, but kicking into an imaginary scenario that I’m picturing in the air, that’s my favorite.
Last night I knocked out 100 kicks. That’s the goal I set for “light” days. But once I get going, even on easy training days, it can be hard to stop because once the dopamine and serotonin kick in, it’s a different world, one where time ceases to exist.
I take plenty of short rest breaks when I’m kicking. I don’t just kick until I’m done. It’s not uncommon for me to begin with kicks in sets of 10. I do them in super slow motion, slow motion, at a fair clip as well as at lightning fast. The variances make it easy to get my work in and make the training invigorating.
I start small so I can tackle it all.
The way I look at it, 10 kicks a day, without missing, is better than thinking I should do 1,000, but I never start because I’ve set a goal so big that I’m resisting going after it.
And that’s one of the previously unrevealed truths about setting all those big, hairy goals. Some of those hairs get stuck on your tongue and in the back of your throat. They make you resist and rebel against the very thing you supposedly decided upon.
Small daily goals remove the emotional resistance you may have to “doing the work.” If you don’t turn something into a “chore,” then your mind is free to have fun and enjoy what you’re doing. It’s also free to go way beyond the initial goal you set. Way, way beyond.
Kick your habits into high gear, one swat at a time.
Matt Furey
P.S. If you’ve already read the 35 million copy best-seller, Psycho-Cybernetics, then take a gander at the advanced courses: Zero Resistance Living and Theatre of the Mind
3 Bizarre Ways to Wake Up Your Brain
If you’re not in the mood to do what you need to do, to get done what needs getting done, especially when you want to get it done, then here are some bizarre ways to light up your brain and get yourself propelled forward:
1. Take out a pen or pencil and begin drawing a series of straight lines. Don’t try to draw the straightest lines you can draw. Instead, mentally picture a straight line being drawn as you move the instrument. If the line isn’t as straight as it would be when using a ruler, then join the club. Even seasoned artists cannot draw lines that straight. After drawing some straight lines, you can move to wavy lines, circles and figure 8’s. Five minutes of his exercise is all you need to kick start your brain.
2. Get your hands dirty by working with plants and trees. If you have a garden, this is easy. If not, you nowhere to go to get started.
Digging into the earth with your hands and feet does more than activate the brain, though. When you take care of what you previously planted, when you observe the seasonal, automatic changes taking place, your mind cannot help but ponder whether or not a Creator’s hand is involved. As you look at the laws of nature with something you planted, you are drawn to examine how these same laws are operating in your life.
3. Do something noisy. Whether it’s beating a drum, cracking a whip, knocking over pins (bowling), hitting golf balls, playing ping pong, singing/chanting, shooting free throws or tapping your fingertips or feet on a floor or table, your brain loves the repetitive sound of noise. It doesn’t take long, either, for your brain to relax, to leave the limbic world of fight, flight or freeze and enter the world of the creative gene-yes (genius).
All of these exercises give you some creative ways to blow off steam and gain a feeling of control over your life.
It’s true, sometimes, even when we want to get going, we can resist doing so. This is when it is a grand idea to pull some tools out of your grab bag and get yourself going, without even realizing you are doing so. Giving your hands something to do is ideal because your hands (and feet) have more nerve endings connected to your brain than any other areas of the body.
See it. Feel it. Be it.
Matt Furey
Psycho-Cybernetics.com
P.S. For more information on getting coached in Psycho-Cybernetics and Theatre of the Mind, go here.
Over-Motivation
All of us have seen people who are under-motivated, but can someone be over-motivated?
All throughout the latter chapters of Psycho-Cybernetics, Dr. Maltz refers to the dangers, not only of being overly-inhibited in word and deed, but also the pitfalls of being overly-hyped.
Yes, enthusiasm, motivation, inspiration and desire are essential qualities on a successful journey, but too much of any single quality can become a weakness. You can be so motivated to accomplish a goal that you push yourself out of contention. You have trouble relaxing and being natural because you want it sooooo bad.
There’s a fine line between having sufficient enthusiasm to accomplish an objective, and so much that you over-shoot the target.
Here are a few visuals of over-motivation:
1. Picture someone throwing wild haymakers in a fight instead of using short, quick and powerful jabs, hooks and uppercuts. As the fighter rears back with his best John Wayne impression, he gets popped several times.
2. A pitcher in softball or baseball is so determined to throw strikes that he or she cannot find the plate. Even worse, the ball sails over the catcher’s head, all the way to the backstop.
3. In a job interview, the applicant wants to be hired so badly that there is zero calmness under pressure. All the wrong answers are given for simple questions that you could easily handle if you were relaxed and at ease.
Back in my early years of business, the same client, Jack, who recommended Psycho-Cybernetics to me, told me he thought I was over-motivated. Even though I had read the book a couple times by then, I had no recall of the term “over-motivation.” The same is true of almost everyone I meet today and begin coaching.
Where is the fine line that separates having enough motivation and having too much?
That’s something you’ll discover over time, as you zig-zag your way through life. When you succeed, chances are you weren’t over-motivated. When you fail, you may have been lacking in desire. Then again, you might have had too much.
Keep in mind that a burning candle remains lit without you checking on it 24 hours a day. And so it is with a burning desire.
Check in once or twice per day to make sure your inner candle flame is still going. If it is still going, leave it alone.
Most candles don’t last a month. Most need to be replaced within a day. And so it is with your body, mind and soul. They need to be reignited on a daily basis.
When a candle is finished burning, start a new one. This is the same as practicing Theatre of the Mind. You learn to navigate, listen and feel when the light is going out, when the candle needs to be replaced. When it does, get it going. But don’t sit and watch the rest of the day to make sure it stays lit. Once the flame is going, trust the process and move through your day with the Zero Resistance Living mindset.
See it. Feel it. Be it.
Matt Furey
P.S. Interested in being coached by me? Then go here
Exposing the Massive Action Myth
Yet another one of the myths/lies in the self-development field is the notion of taking “massive action.”
When I teach my coaching members there’s no such thing as taking massive action, they usually look at me with a bewildered expression. I am the first person they have ever heard say this. Everyone else is doing what Earl Nightingale called, “following the follower.”
Similar to Socrates, I end up reducing the ridiculous to reality with a series of questions:
“2,500 years ago, Lao Tzu wrote that the journey of a 1,000 miles begins with a single step,” I begin. “So let’s see if something has fundamentally changed about walking in the past two and a half centuries. If you were on a 1,000-mile journey, how many steps would you take at a time?”
“I would take one step at a time,” someone replies.
“But what if I put both feet together and jump? Does that double the number of steps?” I ask.
“No.”
“That means, even if I double my efforts and jump as far as I can, I only get one jump at a time?”
“That’s correct.”
“But what will happen if I put my feet together and jump forward 1,000 times in a row?”
“You’ll probably injure yourself trying to speed up your progress.”
“So think about this: You take massive action, now you’re exhausted and quite possibly injured. And then you’ll be frustrated. You may begin to think that there’s no way you can achieve your goal. But this is not the case. You can achieve your goal, but you’ll do so one consistent step at a time, not via massive action.”
“That makes sense.”
“Not only does it make sense, it’s a reality,” I add. “Let’s say you decide to walk as many miles as you can every single day. Plus, to prove you’re taking massive action, you put 100 pounds of gear on your back to carry along with you. The 100 pounds represents you making sure you’re doing more than one thing at the same time. That’s your strategy to walk 1,000 miles. And you push yourself each day until there’s nothing left. Meanwhile I, have a different idea. I’m going to walk at least five miles each day. I can walk more than five miles if I’m on a roll, but if I stop at five, I’ve hit my daily goal. As for what I carry with me. A bottle of water and a towel will suffice. Each day, when you and I are finished walking, someone picks us up so we can rest and start again the next day. Now, let me ask, who do you think has the better chance of succeeding?”
“I would say that you do.”
“You nailed it. And the reason is obvious, isn’t it. I have a consistent, daily goal that is manageable. It’s not too big. It doesn’t scare me. It doesn’t drain me of physical energy. And it doesn’t wreak havoc on my nervous system. In fact, each day as I accomplish my goal, I gain energy and momentum while the massive action person loses it.”
Make a note: In Psycho-Cybernetics, there isn’t a single word about taking massive action. Not one.
The reason is simple: It’s not a natural, spontaneous, free-flowing and momentum-building approach to achievement.
The same goes for getting out of your comfort zone. There’s nothing in Psycho-Cybernetics that gives this type of advice, either.
The key is finding your comfort zone and expanding with force. You do this by having a daily achievable goal that leads you to the 1,000-mile, the 10,000 or the 1,000,000-mile marker in a relaxed, “I got this” manner.
On a daily basis, remember to eliminate the angst and anxiety of trying to build Rome overnight. You cannot build a city overnight – but you can build one, or anything else, if you keep moving, one humble step at a time.
See it. Feel it. Do it.
Matt Furey
P.S. I’ve been getting a number of questions about recommenced products you can give as presents over the Christmas season. In addition to Psycho-Cybernetics, I strongly suggest 101 Ways to Magnetize Money… In Any Economy, Expect to Win – Hate to Lose, as well as The Unbeatable Man. All three of these books are in the “can’t put it down” variety.
10X Your Ability to Visualize
“Daily practice will bring these mental pictures, or memories, clearer and clearer. The effect of learning will also be cumulative. Practice will strengthen the tie-in between mental image and physical sensation. You will become more and more proficient in relaxation, and this in itself will be “remembered” in future practice sessions.”
– Maxwell Maltz, M.D.
Yes, you can visualize. On a scale from 1-10, you might be a 1, but this doesn’t mean you “can’t do it.” It only means that you CAN and WILL get better at it with consistent practice.
Visualization is the same as any other skill you have already mastered. You didn’t master it by reading about it and “trying” it once or twice. You practiced religiously. Whether you want to improve a little bit, or to 10X your skills, practice is the path you tread.
If you want to learn to draw, play a musical instrument, build homes or become a professional in any given task, you get better and better with daily practice. No one escapes this truth.
True, some people catch on faster than others, but being slower out of the gate doesn’t mean you “can’t” compete.
Reality proves that being slower in the beginning is oftentimes a tremendous blessing because you now have an opportunity to dedicate yourself to learning the finer details of WHY something works the way it does. Fast learners are prone to taking their abilities for granted, of overlooking the details, and this leaves them susceptible to being surpassed by the “less-talented” person who follows the Laws of Practice.
You can and do picture things in your “mind’s eye” all day long. You do it with your eyes open. You do it when you dream. You do it when you close your eyes and remember a scene from the past or preview a goal you want to accomplish.
As I teach you in Theatre of the Mind, if you have trouble with your eyes closed, practice with your eyes open. This will help you SEE that you are visualizing, you are imagining, and YES, you CAN DO IT.
See it. Feel it. Become it.
Matt Furey
