It’s almost too simple to be believed, yet it’s true.
Whenever you are feeling overwhelmed, stressed or anxious, you are mentally picturing the wrong thing.
Most of the time, the “thing” you are picturing is yourself and the corresponding erroneous notions of not being good enough, smart enough, talented enough, and so on.
In short, you don’t believe in yourself – and you think you should.
Why?
Because that’s what everyone has told you.
“You need to believe in yourself. If you would just believe in yourself, you could do so much better.”
Today, I’m here to tell you that there’s a way out of the maze. And it’s not sitting around working on your personal beliefs.
This is a realization I arrived at one day when I watched my son and daughter accomplish feats that neither of them believed they could accomplish, beforehand. Yet, both of them did.
My son batted .506 his junior year in high school with a 24-game hitting streak. Did he believe he was going to do this ahead of time? Absolutely not.
My daughter’s involvement in ballet grew to the point where she wanted to learn pointe toe and eventually showcase her skills in The Nutcracker, even though she doesn’t have your typical ballet body.
How did the two of them accomplish these objectives if they didn’t believe they were going to?
It’s simple: They suspended their personal beliefs on the matter. They did not focus on whether or not they could or could not do it. Instead, they put their focus on the mental pictures that lead to the finish line. In short, they visualized and imagined being where they wanted to be.
I’m sure that if my son and daughter sat around thinking about their personal beliefs about their goals, they would have felt a sense of overwhelm.
Why do I say this? I say it because of all the people I have seen who are focused on themselves instead of the objective. And guess what happens to them? They get overwhelmed with negative emotions.
Their focus is on whether they are good enough, likable enough, credible enough, tall enough, fit enough, well-dressed enough, ad infinitum, ad nauseam.
Meanwhile, someone who never thinks about any of the above, someone who is far less talented, good looking, etc. focuses on the objective and nails it.
Funny, eh?
Well then, what’s the way out of this mess?
It begins by reversing the erroneous notions you were taught. And the way to begin reversing them is by practicing Dao Zou – a moving meditation technique I learned over 15 years ago that I use to eliminate negative emotions of every kind.
Why do I recommend this program? I recommend it because it combines movement with visualization and deep breathing.
In short, you’re practicing what I wrote about in Theatre of the Mind, while you’re on the go. This means you’re nailing two objectives with one arrow.
One of my coaching members has been practicing Dao Zou for nearly ninety straight days, without a miss. To say his life has been transformed would be underplaying the reality of the situation.
As you move, suspend your beliefs about can or cannot, about believe or believe not. Just follow the program and you will make your own discoveries.
See it. Feel it. Live it.
Matt Furey
Psycho-Cybernetics.com
P.S. Looking for coaching on how to succeed without worrying or belly-aching over your limiting beliefs? Drop me a line and I’ll get back with you.
Money, Honey
Sorry to disappoint, but this isn’t a “No money, no honey,” message.
It’s even better than that.
When my son, Frank, was 18 months of age, I was sitting on the floor with my wife, putting books in envelopes to take to the post office.
I was listening to an audio program about prosperity as I worked, and the next thing you know, my boy starts pounding a box with a spoon while singing, “Money, honey. Money, honey.”
When I heard Frank singing this, I stopped everything I was doing. I grabbed a pen and wrote those two words on a card, thanking him while doing so.
Think of all the awful mental images people have about money.
It’s dirty.
It’s filthy.
It doesn’t grow on trees.
It’s evil.
But this is nothing but programming.
My son didn’t have such software installed in his brain when he was a baby. Neither do you.
We learn negative thoughts about money – and forever afterward, our life reflects these ideas, unless we interrupt the program and get updated software that brings a different reality into existence.
Money will take on whatever flavoring you bestow upon it.
It will go where it is appreciated.
It will stay away from those who resent, despise or condemn it.
Make money sweet in your imagination, put a smile upon its face, and you’ll find it a lot easier to magnetize into your life.
Matt Furey
It Hurts, I Know and I Understand
Back in February, my son’s senior year of high school baseball began, and as the saying goes, “all bets were off.”
I don’t know what it is about this game, which no parent should EVER allow his or her son to play. unless, of course, you want
to teach your child how to overcome mistakes and feelings of failure – which he will probably NEVER encounter in any other area of life. (Sarcasm intended).
The team went 24-4 and finished in the Final Four at the state championships – which is to say – they were doing great… until they LOST.
Yes, I still HATE losing – even when it’s not me playing the game.
By the way, one of the worst things you can say to someone after a loss is “congratulations.”
Hearing “congratulations”after you lose in the semifinals or finals, sucks beyond all rational comprehension.
It really does.
The very BEST thing you can say to a player after a loss is….
“It hurts, I know and I understand.”
Then give the player a hug and let him know you love him and are proud of him, regardless.
Back in the early 1990’s, when I was learning about the power of deep breathing at an entirely new level, I spoke to my instructor, Nancy, about how strange I felt leaving my old home and moving into a new one.
I mentioned how I felt a sense of loss, even though I couldn’t wait to move out of the old and into the new.
Nancy nodded and replied: “Anytime you make a change and leave someone or something behind, the emotion of grief is present. You may suppress it, but it’s there.”
Is there grief when a season ends? When a child graduates? When a daughter gets married and moves on?
Is there grief when your team loses the World Series, or the Super Bowl?
You better believe it.
This is why you see grown men cry after losing a pivotal game. It’s not because they are cry babies or can’t take it. It’s because they are human beings feeling an overpowering emotion.
Getting past the grief is necessary, though, as it’s pretty hard to operate when you’re filled with sadness.
The fastest ways to assuage the pain and rid yourself of the grief and sadness are as follows:
1. Breathe deeply and let the feelings come up. As you continue to breathe, they will dissipate.
2. Talk to others who understand and are compassionate.
3. Write about it. Let your feelings pour onto a piece of paper – preferably by hand.
4. Do something physical – such as walking, punching a heavy bag, stretching, etc.
5. Most powerful of all, look for and find the positive memories stored in your brain or “personal cloud.”
Download those memories. Relive them. Re-experience them. Make the memories come alive again – and use them to step into the future once again, willing to take risks with confidence and courage.
As you do so, realize that mistakes and failures are there for a reason – and the reasons are almost always a huge positive, as well as an unseen and currently unimagined benefit to you in the long run,
Discover how to do all of the above at a superhuman level by reading Psycho-Cybernetics – or by investing in the more advanced course entitled Zero Resistance Living.
And it that’s not enough, then enroll in my Theater of the Mind Facebook group.
All for now,
Matt Furey
P.S. Also, if you want to learn how to write emails such as this one, and dramatically improve your business, then go here.
The New Addiction
Today’s my 35th birthday (this calculation is based upon going back in time) and as I was fishing through my files to send yet another book off to be published, I found the following magazine column I wrote back in 2006 – a scant ten years ago.
You’re going to enjoy reading this article, especially in light of recent surveys and tests, wherein you will find the MAJORITY of our population, both children and adults, are addicted to their “smart phones.”
Here ’tis:
Just got back from a walk along the beach with a couple clients. While trapsing across the sand and shells – and avoiding the jelly fish that are in the shallow waters, I explained to them the importance of “taking a pause” from technology.
As great as our computers, cell phones and other gadgets are – I believe they can also be a curse.
People today are MORE mesmerized by their gadgets than anything else. And with this techno-hypnosis comes amnesia for WHO and WHAT created the technology.
People created these gadgets with the power of thought.
But those who use the gadgets forget that YOU are the owner of the greatest Super Computer in the Universe. YOU are both a broadcasting and receiving station.
YOU are the one who creates – not the other way around.
In my seminars I don’t allow any techno gadgets of any kind. At first, the techno-addicts are irritated. But, if they’re open, they soon realize I’m doing them a favor.
Some cannot stand it so they have attempted to go unnoticed,
sitting in the back row with their smart
device on their lap, under the table, scrolling
emails when they could be listening to a riveting message. Even if the person gets away with it, temporarily, what has he gained?
Nothing.
I carry a cell phone with me much of the time – yet I rarely answer it unless it is family or someone I am expecting a call from. I have no problem pausing and letting the thing ring without answering. Doesn’t bother me if someone is angry about this either.
The other day I was talking to a guy who said, “You know, remember when we didn’t have voice mail, email or FAX. If you weren’t home and the phone rang – you still managed to go on living. Now with all the technology, people feel they can’t get anything done even though they are “on call” all the time.”
Good point.
Use technology to enhance your life – but don’t let it control you. Know when to say no.
Take a pause. It’s good to give yourself space.
Take time to sit quietly and breathe. Breathe into the Super Computer within. Delete the garbage. Make space for new information.
Picture the aspects of your life you’re grateful for. Remember your happiest moments. Relive them and rejuvenate yourself.
And for heaven’s sake – do not sleep with your phone next to you. Put it in another room and take a pause.
Do the above and I guarantee you’ll get more fulfillment out of life.
Matt Furey
Psycho-Cyb.com
How to Impress Others
Last night I dropped by my daughter’s dance class. Normally I don’t watch her class, but the teacher was going a bit beyond schedule, so I took a peak through the glass.
When my daughter saw me peering through the window, I noted that she instantly got a bit nervous. For the next minute or so, she wasn’t her normal graceful self. She stumbled a bit with movements that are normally quite easy for her.
On the drive home I asked, “Did you feel a bit nervous when you saw me watching you today?”
“Yes,” she replied.
“Did you try harder when you saw me?”
“Yes.”
“Were you trying harder because you wanted to do a better job for me than you’d normally do when you practice?”
“Yes.”
“That’s what I thought. Well, I have some advice for you on this if you’d like to hear it.”
“What is it?”
“If you see your Daddy looking through the glass, pretend he’s not there. Don’t try to impress him. Don’t try harder. Don’t try to do more than you normally do. That doesn’t work. Just do what you do and tune me or anyone else out.”
“How do I do that?”
“There are many ways, but one of the best is to imagine a brick wall to the side of you. No one can look through this brick wall. You’re by yourself, totally focused, even when you know you’re not. Can you picture a brick wall right now?”
“Yes.”
“Can you feel how it blocks someone else out?”
“Yes, that works pretty good.”
“Great. Now, just so you know, I had a similar discussion earlier today with a ball player. He was trying to impress the scouts who were at his practice, so he started trying to do more than ever before, and guess what? In trying to do more, he didn’t. If he’d have just been himself and put a wall up to block out the scouts, he’d have been a lot better off.”
The moral of the story is simple: First of all, don’t TRY. The very word “TRY” is guaranteed to make matters worse. Second, if you try to do even more to impress others, you won’t. You’ll do less.
Just DO what you’d normally do and the impressing will take care of itself.
This is where the psychology of what you do is so incredibly important. A dancer’s steps or moves do NOT change because someone else is watching or because you’re on a different stage.
A ball player’s throws, swings, passes or shots don’t change either.
The above applies to anything you’re involved in, whether business, academia, theatre or sports.
If what you’ve been doing is working, trying to do more or do even better won’t lead to more progress. But awareness will of your breathing, your thinking and your body as you do what you do.
I’ve said it before, and written it, too. The word “try” is demonic. It’ll curse you. It’ll cripple you and make you stumble.
The word “DO” is enough. Don’t try to do it. Don’t “just” do it.
Do it. That’s enough.
Be it. Do it. Live it.
That’s the ticket … to the big show.
Best,
Matt Furey
P.S. It’s all about ridding your body/mind of “resistance.” Resistance to success, fear of failing or falling, fear of disappointing others, etc. For deeper instruction in these methods, I suggest the Zero Resistance Living System – or private coaching/mentoring.
Most Evil Word in English Language
Today when I was driving my daughter to dance camp, I asked her if she knew the most important word in the Chinese language; the word that much of the culture is centered around.
She shook her head “no.”
I replied, “It isn’t 好 Hǎo,” which means good.
It’s a word you’d least expect.
It’s the word 慢 (Màn} – pronounced like the Jamaican’s say man – mohn.
The term means “slow” or “slowly.”
Throughout the day people will use this word over and over. In fact, it’s common to say 慢 (Màn} twice before a verb. For example:
Eat slowly – man man chi.
Walk slowly – man man zou
Learn slowly – man man xue
It is this last phrase – 慢慢学习 {màn man xué} or learn slowly I’d like to comment on today, before I reveal to you the most evil word in the English language.
OK, you may wonder how learning slowly can be considered a good thing.
So let’s go back in time. How about when you were an infant.
At that time you absorbed more knowledge without trying than any other time in your life.
You were totally relaxed. You were living in the NOW.
No pressure. No hurry. No worry. No grades. No awards.
Just a whole lot of information you could absorb with ease – and without tension.
So I said to my daughter, “Do you realize that you learned English, Mandarin Chinese, as well as Shanghainese and Sichuanese (two other dialects) before age three – and you weren’t under any pressure to do so? You just absorbed what was around you because you were totally relaxed.”
She’d never pondered the thought, so I elaborated.
“When you study dance – or anything else, the same idea applies. If you’re under stress or tension – it’s difficult to learn. If you’re relaxed and engaged, you can learn quickly, even when you’re not trying to do so.”
I then told her about the most evil word in the English language.
“When you train today, remember to never TRY to learn anything. Just relax, be engaged and allow yourself to learn. But don’t TRY. You cannot TRY and successfully do anything. That’s why it’s the most evil word in any language – but especially English.”
“The word TRY will keep you from ever fulfilling any of your desires. You cannot TRY anything. You either do it or you don’t. As Yoda said in Star Wars, “Do or do not, there is no try.”
As I drove I coninued. “Throughout the rest of your life, whenever you hear anyone use the word try, understand that they’re probably NOT going to do what they say they’re trying to do.”
“If someone says he’ll TRY to make it to a party – he’s not going.”
“If someone says he’ll try to lose weight or stop drinking or stop smoking – or anything else – it not going to happen.”
“If someone tries to make money, he can’t.”
“And especially true is anyone trying to learn something. You cannot try to learn something. You either engage and learn it – or you don’t.”
Whether you are willing to slow down to speed up your learning of something, one thing is for certain, you cannot do it by trying to do it.
Eliminate the word “try” from your vocabulary and you’ll notice yourself relaxing, getting into flow and being far more effective in all that you do.
Don’t believe me?
Then go ahead and test it.
Just don’t “try it.” If you “try” – you’re going to be disappointed.
The above and a whole lot more is contained within the Zero Resistance Living System – available for the next day at a greatly reduced amount.
Grab a copy of this award-generating program and your life will never be the same again.
Yours,
Matt Furey
Success is in Your Jeans
Several months ago I was consulting with a man who wants to be a writer. Thing is, for most of his life, he’s felt incapable of being one.
Why?Well, that’s simple.
From his formative years in school, all his teachers told him that his writing was awful, that it was below grade level, that it was sloppy and careless.
I asked to see a sample of this young man’s writing. I wanted to see proof that he was as bad as his teachers (and parents) told him.
Upon reviewing the man’s work, I saw a lot of area for improvement – but the biggest area was NOT in the words he chooses or his style or syntax. It was in how others in positions of influence spoke to him about his writing.
As I looked up from his papers, he stared at me expecting “more of the same.”
Instead of telling him that he’s good or not so good – I chose another route.
I said, “Well, it looks to me like you definitely have the writing gene.”
The man’s face brightened. He began to glow with confidence and he instantly began telling me how much he’d improved.
Over the last few months, almost everything this man sends me for review is outstanding. Way beyond what he’d written before he put on his writing jeans.
That’s write/right. Jeans/genes.
We’ve heard that everyone puts his or her jeans on the same way as everyone else. Everyone does it one leg at a time.
Is that so?
Well, if it is, why not change it?.
Sit on the edge of your bed, and pull your jeans/genes on both legs at a time. And when you do so, tell yourself you’re putting on your success genes.
Yes, that pair. The pair you CAN turn on.
True, some genes you have no control over. Hair color, eye color, height, bone structure, etc.
But when it comes to talent – much of what we think of as “genetic” isn’t necessarily so – and if it is, there’s good news. You can “turn on” genes that are lying dormant within you.
Don’t believe me? Then read The Biology of Belief by Dr. Bruce Lipton.
The short course to turning on dormant genes is environmental. It’s what you’re around, who you’re around and the messages
going into your mind.
If you get messages/mental pictures of impossibility, then genes you have that could be activated remain in their slumber.
Honestly, I don’t know of any able-minded person who doesn’t have the writing gene. Or the music gene. Or the art gene. Or the language gene. And so on.
All of us are capable of learning just about anything. But in order to do so, a certain amount of BELIEF is necessary to get the cylinder rolling.
Some have a sense of belief within them that no one can turn on or off. Others need a helping word or phrase. But you’d be amazed at how a few words can improve or sideline a person if he believes them.
Not that long ago my tai chi teacher confided in me. He said when I began with him, he didn’t think I’d ever be any good at it. He assumed I would quit within a month or two. Today, he tells me I’m the best student he’s ever had. No one has learned the techniques as quickly, or as well, in such a short period of time.
My daughter loves to dance. She’s absolutely passionate about it. She doesn’t have the body of a classical ballet dancer – yet she loves ballet and every other form of dance she’s ever studied.
Someone once said to me that, based on her build, she has no future in dance, that she should do something else that she’s genetically predisposed to doing.
Well, first of all, she loves dancing, and I’m all in favor of children doing what they love to do activity wise – not what the parents decided they must do because …. because that’s what our family does – or some other lame reason like … “the future.”
The future is NOW. Take care of the NOW and the future will be just fine.
Second, what exactly are you talking about when you say “no future” in something, particularly dance?
She may not have a classical ballet dancers body right now – or ever – but can’t she just enjoy dancing for it’s own sake?
Third, ballet is only one form of dancing – and last time I checked, there are not only many different types of dancing, but there are people of every shape and size enjoying it and doing it well.
No future?
Really? Says who?
And if you get a name thrown back at you remember Rodney Dangerfield’s line in Caddyshack, “Who died and made you pope of this dump?”
We can prognosticate and pontificate with the best of the best. We can predict the future of others by punishing them with our words and phrases.
This is far easier than admitting the truth.
And what is truth?
“We don’t know.”
Truly, we don’t know how our children or anyone else is going to turn out if we let them practice their dream, their passion, their NOW.
We may look at them and scoff. We may think that he or she is wasting time (future). But there are too many parents and teachers proven wrong for us to act like we know anything for sure.
More than 20 years ago I recall making a scrapbook filled with photos of what I’d like to accomplish in the future. One of them was having an audio program with Nightingale-Conant.
For nearly 20 years the future looked like it would never happen. And then, one day, from out of nowhere, I had a signed contract with them. A month later I was in their studios, recording Theatre of the Mind. Today it’s a best seller.
In fact, it’s done so well I get requests for coaching nearly every day. So many that I end up turning some down. This is one of the tough areas to navigate as a coach. Even so, I’m clear on one thing, I will NEVER turn someone down because he supposedly has “no future.”
Everyone has a future. A bright future. If you’ll allow the genes within your jeans to be turned on.
My wish is simple: I wish to give you words of encouragement that will turn on your success genes and put you on the path of success – and help you continue your journey on that path, forever.
Your Future is NOW. And it’s bright.
Matt Furey
P.S. You can get a copy of Theatre of the Mind for $40 off the original amount right now. With each order you’ll also receive a special surprise gift that you cannot get anywhere else. So live it up NOW and enjoy!
#1 Path to Success
This morning, Michael, a private client, who lives in the area, met me at 10 AM for a session.
He says, “I’ve been walking six miles a day. I do three in the morning and three more at night – and I listen to your Theatre of the Mind CDs the entire time. It’s awesome.”
“Great,” I said. “Let’s go for a walk.”
He smiled.
We started to walk and talk. And as we walked he began to ask questions. Really good questions.
He wanted to know the main difference between self-esteem and self-image – and how each relates to success.
He wanted to know why some people who achieve various successes, still don’t feel good deep inside.
I explained to him that many people cannot wrap their mind around the very word “success.”
They don’t have a clear or working definition of what it is. Ask these people to tell you about a success experience they’ve had and they literally draw blanks.
Truly. They cannot conceive of a single success experience.
Even if they’ve completed 8 years of college and have a doctorate – or they’re medical doctors, they can still find reasons WHY they haven’t really had a success experience yet.
I know people who’ve built their own homes, earned a ton of dough, married the woman of their dreams, written books, created companies, traveled the whirld – and yet, deep down, they still feel like nothing.
How can this be possible?
Truth be told, this situation is more common than you’d think.
Some people don’t feel successful, regardless of what they’ve done, because they don’t know how to be grateful, to stop and smell, touch and kiss the roses.
As soon as they accomplish one thing, they’re off to the next thing. Gratitude doesn’t exist. Taking time to breathe and be free doesn’t exist.
It’s more, more, more.
And more is good – provided you have the decency to appreciate what you have, where you’ve been and what you’ve got.
How many people do you know who say “thank you” – and mean it?
How often do you take a few moments during your day to think about all the things, all the people, all the circumstances you’ve had, are having – or will soon have – and how marvelous it is to be in your shoes – with or without the problems that go with it?
How often?
Chances are excellent that you NEVER take the time to be grateful. Or you do it so seldom the answer is practically never.
Last night I was playing ball with my son. When we finished, I said, “Son, I have something for you.”
I walked toward him. He’s waiting for me to give him something. But where is this something? Where am I hiding it? Am I going to get it out of my car? Or from the house?
As I walked toward him I could sense his curiosity growing. And when I was a foot away, I threw my arms around his torso and gave him a hug.
“Way to work today,” I said. “That’s awesome.”
We tend to overlook the little things that pay big dividends.
We tend to overlook the bigger things that are central to where we are today.
And we’re so good at overlooking the little and the bigger – that we even overlook the really BIG things, the pivotal people, the life-changers, the knowledge, the information, the six honest serving men – as Kipling called them.
No, I’m not successful because I’m not as rich as Bill Gates.
That’s B.S.
No, I’m not successful because I wasn’t valedictorian, or didn’t win the World Series, or the Super Bowl or get my Ph.D.
More B.S.
No, I’m not successful because ….
Because what?
You’re alive, aren’t you? Your heart’s still beating. You can still breathe. You can still walk, talk, read, write and feed yourself.
The fact is you could do NONE of the above when you were getting started – and breathing and having a heart beat are not something you do to yourself. They’re automatic.
Even if you cover your mouth to forcibly stop breathing, eventually nature will force your hand so you gasp for air.
So what’s the #1 Path to Success?
It’s the path of remembering who you are, where you came from, who helped you along the way – and how grateful and happy you are for everyone and everything.
Know someone who won’t show gratitude?
They’re on the path to failure.
And you’re not.
The greatness of Theatre of the Mind is that the process puts you into a state of gratitude and a state of flow – and it does so easily and naturally, without you even realizing it.
What a way to live.
Yours,
Matt Furey
P.S. Want to know of one of the biggest reasons why so many visualizers, affirmers and goal setters never get what they want? Listen to Theatre of the Mind and it’ll be clearer than crystal.
Biggest Mistake Coaches Make
The other day I gave my daughter a tennis lesson.
I decided to do so after watching her get a private lesson from a very good coach.
As I watched her lesson, though, I made a few mental notes on what to work on. There was one mistake that she repeatedly made – so I devised a way to correct it for her, within 5 minutes, and do so without ever telling her she was doing anything wrong.
What?
Now, that’s a pretty big idea, especially when I’m not a tennis coach and for all “practical” purposes, am not qualified to give instruction on the game.
Okay, if I’m “not qualified” – how’d the session go with my daughter?
Well, first let me tell you what I didn’t do – EVER, in the entire lesson.
First, I gave zero instruction on mechanics, how to hit the ball or anything remotely close.
Second, I never corrected her mechanics in any way.
Third, I believed I could have her hitting the ball correctly within a few minutes with this “mental game” method.
So what happened?
In less than five minutes, she was stroking the ball better than ever.
Now, how could that be? Am I joking?
Not at all.
Here’s the trick: People make mistakes all the time when they do something new. And they’re told by coaches that in order to create “muscle memory” they need to repeat their technique 2,000 times in a row in order to have a repeatable movement pattern that’s on auto-pilot.
This is totally false and misleading.
Far too many coaches and teachers still don’t realize that mistakes are NOT a bad thing – so long as you learn from them and use them as feedback to guide you to a BETTER – not a perfect – performance.
IF you continually point out mistakes – you cause the person to become a bit more tense and a bit more inhibited. More tension and more inhibition lead to reduced performance.
So the key is to reduce tension and reduce inhibition – to remove the fear and frustration of making mistakes. To actually VALUE your mistakes. To practice without pressure so that you can think and make adjustments.
As a coach, if you don’t condemn mistakes, neither will the player.
If you don’t have something to say after every shot – the silence will do more to help the athlete than your barking about technique and mechanics.
You’ve got to trust that the player isn’t an idiot, that if you know when to leave her alone – she’ll actually turn out better.
You’ve got to know what not to say.
You’ve got to know how to give the athlete the control so she can make the adjustments on her own and figure it out herself.
And the amazing thing is you don’t even have to know the game in order to do this.
Let me tell you, my daughter was smiling and having a blast. She was loving the game more than ever.
Her Dad was a genius. How’d he know all this stuff to help her get better so fast?
What I know is how to “Defeat the Failure Mechanism.”
That’s right. The Failure Mechanism.
If you don’t know how to shut the feelings of frustration, fear and inhibition OFF – no amount of positive thinking will help you.
Why?
Because the failure mechanism will undermine all the positive stuff you’re trying to do.
As parents, coaches and teachers, many of us unknowingly contribute to the inhibition, fear and frustration of those we love. It’s sad but true.
I did so myself.
Until I discovered the secrets of defeating the failure mechanism.
Once I had these keys in mind and began implementing them, I was no longer the same coach, teacher or parent.
I’d like to pass these keys on to you. If interested let me know.
Yours,
Matt Furey
P.S. Remember, you can save $40 off the price of Theatre of the Mind if you order NOW. It’s the best CD program out there – and was created without a bit of self-criticism on my part. It was all FLOW. Listen to this program and it’ll connect you to the Force of FLOW as well.
Why Thinking Hurts Performance
This past weekend I worked with a young athlete in a way most coaches don’t quite understand.
Unlike almost ALL coaches – the Fure-cat does things a bit different.
There’s next to no talk about mechanics or HOW to do the skills the youhg man has already been taught.
Instead, my focus is on getting him to do what he’s already learned how to do – over and over again. On command. With ease. With relaxation. With next to no effort.
And perhaps most importantly – without thinking.
That’s right. WITHOUT THINKING.
This may be the first time you’ve heard such “heresy” – but what I’ve discovered over the years is this: Thinking is over-rated. Thinking interferes with your performance. Thinking makes you… think – instead of spontaneously acting.
Yes, I realize that being spontaneous 100% of the time is probably NOT a good idea. I’m not saying you should or shouldn’t be a thinker or a non-thinker 100% of the time.
What I’m saying is this: If you’re struggling, if you’re having a tough time, you’re probably thinking more than doing – and this pattern needs to change if you’re ever going to get anywhere.
In my work, I’ve proven to my clients, that by changing your mental pictures – you change how you feel, how you act, how you move your body – and most importantly, the results you get in life.
But wait a minute, isn’t picturing something in your mind “thinking?”
No, it’s not.
Thinking is a left-brain linear, rational. logical way of being. In the left brain, you don’t picture goals, use your imagination, construct mental movies and amplify your emotions.
So mental picturing is not thinking in the typical sense of the word.
Consider this for a moment. In a child’s first five years of existence, he or she usually learns MORE than the rest of his life combined.
And ALL the learning was done without trying. There was zero effort attached to it. Baby saw – baby got an image in mind – baby imitated.
Baby imagined – baby did.
It often happened quickly, spontaneously.
Babies can learn multiple languages simultaneously – without you “trying” to help them learn. Babies are literal sponges who effortlessly absorb the good, the great – and the not so good.
Then the adults come along and train the baby out of the child – and he most likely suffers the rest of his life because of it.
Baby came into the whirld breathing from the lower belly, relaxed and free of tension.
By age five, that’s no longer the case.
Baby came into the whirld with endless possibilities. By agefive, we’ve narrowed things down dramatically.
And we’ve forgotten . or most likely never learned, how our brain and central nervous system work to bring us the results we’re getting in our lives.
We think words are most important. But they’re not – and that’s saying a lot because I use words for a living.
What is most important then?
Images and emotions.
They precede language. That’s why our brain responds to them FASTER than anything else.
Look at it this way: Our muscles don’t understand language. Our biceps doesn’t understand English, or Chinese, or Spanish or Pig Latin.
So I’m working with the athlete. What do you think I’m teaching him?
Same thing I’m teaching those I coach in the art of writing – or in business.
If you can form a mental picture of what you want to do or be – and if you can see and feel yourself doing it – and if you’re willing to act to get what you want – then chances are dramatically increased in your favor.
Is success guaranteed?
No.
But so long as you’ve chosen a goal that is within the realm of the possible for you (me being 7’0″ tall and playing in the NBA was not within the realm of the possible), your chances of success go UP in a BIG WAY.
On the other hand, if you don’t have a mental image of what you want, an image that is amplified with emotion – then your
chances of succeeding are ZERO.
ZERO even if the goal is achievable.
ZERO even if you have the ability.
ZERO even if you have the smarts, know-how, brain-power, etc.
ZERO even if you have mentors and coaches.
ZERO even if you have a library of how-to on the subject..
This is why I say the mental image of what you want comes first. And if you don’t have it, you better get it – and NOW – or quit deluding yourself into thinking you’re gonna make it someday.
You’re NOT – UNLESS YOU change the way you SEE yourself.
This is why Theatre of the Mind is the most important program I’ve ever created.
It gives you the tools to condition your brain for success by working on the most important factor first.
All the hard work in the world, all the thinking – won’t amount to a hill of coffee beans if you don’t see yourself where you want to be first.
Note: We currently have 50 copies of Theatre of the Mind that we’re making available for $40 off the usual amount. Latch onto your copy today and change your life for the better.
Yours,
Matt Furey
P.S. There’s a bonus that comes with Theatre of the Mind that will help you change your mental pictures with ease. Go for it.
