Matt Furey – Page 7

Controversial: To Spank or Not to Spank

September 25, 2014 by Matt Furey

Over the past two weeks I’ve been listening to accusations of child abuse involving NFL running back Adrian Peterson and his four-year old son.

The allegations go way beyond a slap or swat on the rumpus. Word is that the boy sustained welts and bruises all over his body. Some of the wounds supposedly drew blood.

Last Wednesday, whilst driving to practice Tai Chi, I turned on the radio and instead of music, I listened to a call-in show. Guess what the topic of conversation was?

“Should you spank your child and if you do, when does a spanking cross the line and equal abuse?”

Both men and women rang the station. The announcer himself talked about how he got beat regularly by his parents – and even told how he doesn’t just threaten his children with “the belt” – because threats aren’t sufficient.

Yep, at times he takes off the belt and gives his children an unspecified number of lashes.

Although i was only listening for about 40 minutes, I didn’t hear a single parent say that spanking your child is wrong under any and all circumstances.

Neither will I.

But what I will say is what was taught to me long ago by an Aikido martial arts master.

To paraphrase the story:

One day an Aikido master saw a father angrily beating his child. As he hit the boy, the father yelled and screamed.

The master interrupted the scene and pulled the boy’s father to the side. In typical Zen fashion, he did NOT condemn the father for his actions. Instead, he gave him another way of experiencing life with his son.

“You can hit your son anytime you want,” said the Aikido master. “But ONLY under one condition.”

“What’s the condition?” the man asked.

“When you hit him, you cannot do so with anger. You can only spank him if you feel love in your heart for your child.”

The next time the boy stepped out of line, the father remembered the master’s advice. Instead of hitting him, he rid himself of the anger and replaced it with love.”

Surprisingly, after doing this, he felt no need to hit his son. He spoke to him instead – taking his time to teach him right from wrong.

The father did not hit his son that day. Or any other day thereafter.

Why?

Because it is almost impossible to hit or spank a child when you are not angry with him. If you take the time to clear your anger and replace it with love, chances are you’ll rethink how you handle your interaction with your child.

Now, you might think the above is “just a story.”

It’s not. It’s real life.

There are many parents who actually believe if they don’t hit their child, the child will NOT respect them. Or obey.

Really?

There are many ways to win the respect and obedience of your children without spanking them. And no, I’m not talking about “timeouts.”

I’m talking about challenging them in a physical way that highlights “who’s the boss” without hurting anyone.

For example, is it plausible that Adrian Peterson could lightly wrestle with his son to get the point across?

Come here, son. You don’t want to listen? Okay, let’s wrestle for a few minutes and if you can beat me, then you call the shots.

I’m betting that it would be a great match. Adrian’s son would squirm and maneuver with all his might – yet be controlled with light pressure. I’m also willing to bet the match would end with laughter and a very different level of respect.

No belts necessary. No switches. No punches, hits or slaps.

Just the tentacles of a giant human octopus (that’s what he’ll feel like to his son).

Yes, I realize a lot of parents think they aren’t physically fit enough to wrestle with their children. But an NFL football player does fit the mould of someone who can.

Controlling your child with the least amount of force necessary makes a lot more sense than whacking him with your fist – or hitting him with a belt or switch.

As I’ve observed, parents who feel they must spank their children, rarely make a lasting impression. That’s why so many of them feel the need to spank their children so often.

Having a heart-to-heart with your child may not feel very easy for you. Using a belt or switch might seem like it’s much faster, quicker and easier.

As a parent, I can tell you that the word is mightier than the belt. Your children will remember your words and use them to make themselves better, if you choose them wisely.

About all they’ll remember from the beatings is the desire to “pass it on.”

Here endeth today’s lesson.

Yours,

Matt “Coach” Furey

P.S. Theatre of the Mind is filled with many stories and examples to help any parent become better than his or her parents ever thought of being. Grab your copy NOW for $40 off the normal retail amount.

Controversial: To Spank or Not to Spank

September 25, 2014 by Matt Furey

Over the past two weeks I’ve been listening to accusations of child abuse involving NFL running back Adrian Peterson and his four-year old son.

The allegations go way beyond a slap or swat on the rumpus. Word is that the boy sustained welts and bruises all over his body. Some of the wounds supposedly drew blood.

Last Wednesday, whilst driving to practice Tai Chi, I turned on the radio and instead of music, I listened to a call-in show. Guess what the topic of conversation was?

“Should you spank your child and if you do, when does a spanking cross the line and equal abuse?”

Yep, at times he takes off the belt and gives his children an unspecified number of lashes.

Although i was only listening for about 40 minutes, I didn’t hear a single parent say that spanking your child is wrong under any and all circumstances.

Neither will I.

But what I will say is what was taught to me long ago by an Aikido martial arts master.

To paraphrase the story:

One day an Aikido master saw a father angrily beating his child. As he hit the boy, the father yelled and screamed.

“You can hit your son anytime you want,” said the Aikido master. “But ONLY under one condition.”

“What’s the condition?” the man asked.

“When you hit him, you cannot do so with anger. You can only spank him if you feel love in your heart for your child.”

The next time the boy stepped out of line, the father remembered the master’s advice. Instead of hitting him, he rid himself of the anger and replaced it with love.”

Surprisingly, after doing this, he felt no need to hit his son. He spoke to him instead – taking his time to teach him right from wrong.

The father did not hit his son that day. Or any other day thereafter.

Why?

Now, you might think the above is “just a story.”

It’s not. It’s real life.

There are many parents who actually believe if they don’t hit their child, the child will NOT respect them. Or obey.

Really?

There are many ways to win the respect and obedience of your children without spanking them. And no, I’m not talking about “timeouts.”

I’m talking about challenging them in a physical way that highlights “who’s the boss” without hurting anyone.

For example, is it plausible that Adrian Peterson could lightly wrestle with his son to get the point across?

Come here, son. You don’t want to listen? Okay, let’s wrestle for a few minutes and if you can beat me, then you call the shots.

No belts necessary. No switches. No punches, hits or slaps.

Just the tentacles of a giant human octopus (that’s what he’ll feel like to his son).

Yes, I realize a lot of parents think they aren’t physically fit enough to wrestle with their children. But an NFL football player does fit the mould of someone who can.

Controlling your child with the least amount of force necessary makes a lot more sense than whacking him with your fist – or hitting him with a belt or switch.

As I’ve observed, parents who feel they must spank their children, rarely make a lasting impression. That’s why so many of them feel the need to spank their children so often.

Having a heart-to-heart with your child may not feel very easy for you. Using a belt or switch might seem like it’s much faster, quicker and easier.

As a parent, I can tell you that the word is mightier than the belt. Your children will remember your words and use them to make themselves better, if you choose them wisely.

About all they’ll remember from the beatings is the desire to “pass it on.”

Here endeth today’s lesson.

Yours,

Matt “Coach” Furey

No Such Thing as Success or Failure

August 12, 2014 by Matt Furey

In a coaching call I held a few weeks ago, a client told me that he felt like “a failure.”

Despite the fact that he makes a very good income and has a wonderful family, he looks at what he hasn’t accomplished yet and deems himself unworthy and undeserving.

After listening to him vent, I said the following in my down-home, low-key manner:

“Dude, you’ve got some wrong thinking going on. You think there is such a thing as a SUCCESS. You think there’s also such a thing as a FAILURE. Neither exist in this whirld. There’s no possibility of being one or the other – so this means your entire thought process is wrong.”

Long pause.

“Now for the better news,” I continued. “You can have successful experiences as well as failure experiences – but neither of these make you a success or failure. If you make a gazillion bucks – does that make you a success? No. And if it did, losing it would make you a failure, right?

“Yet, at any stage in your life, you can shift or change course. You can stop living successfully and default to a life of failing – or you can stop failing and start winning. If you win today – you still go on. You continue on your journey.

“The next day you might not win. So how can you be a success one day and a failure the next?

“You’re can’t because you’re neither. You’re either living successfully or you’re not. So if you judge yourself and your life in absoultes, you’re going to feel bad about yourself much of the time because you cannot always win.”

My client paused for a moment after hearing the above and said, “You know, no one has ever told me this before.”

“You’re a member of a very large group of people who can say the same,” I replied.

“Okay, so what do I need to do to get back on the winning track? I’ve been wanting to write a book. But I just sit and think and over-analyze. What do you recommend?”

“Thinking is over-rated,” I replied.

I could feel his jaw drop when I said this.

“Remember this,” I continued. “Great thinkers don’t think.”

This comment nearly shattered his brain.

“What do you mean by that?” he asked. “I always thought good writing was good thinking.”

“Well, as I was told by a fellow wrestler at Iowa when I told him I THOUGHT something, he said, ‘You THOUGHT, HUH? Well, that’s what you get for your thinking.’ ”

I continued: “Good writing is not done with thinking. Good writing is being in a state of flow. It’s like being connected to the sky above the clouds. And once you have that connection, you listen to the still small voice within, and record
what you hear it saying.”

Over the course of the next 20 minutes, I proceeded to lay out more details on how quickly you can get connected to that voice.

If you’re wondering what some of these details are, then I suggest you grab your share of the wealth by getting my Tao of Email Copywriting course. It’s the go-to course for top-tier writers and copywriters around the whirld.

I kind you not as I’ve been given a license to brag – on occasion, so long as I keep it under five minutes at a time.

True. Many of the whilrd’s best-selling authors are on my list and hang on my every werd – even those I deliberately misspell (two in this here sentence).

The same goes for those in the copywriting trade, i.e. those who make their living putting words on paper in order to sell products and services for their clients.

There are many people who can teach you how you should write – but there is no “WAY” that feels right or is right if you don’t have a connection to the Infinite when you sit before a blank piece of paper – or screen.

That’s the way I see things – and believe me now as well as listen to me later, I have “right view” on what I’m seeing.

So sayeth the ZM.

Signing off now with the powerful words I wrote about in yesterday’s email…

Peace and Love,

Matt Furey

P.S. In the Tao of Email Copywriting you’ll learn how to supercharge your words and phrases with energy that is available to all of us, anytime, any day. And that includes YOU. So put ye failures behind you. And stop thinking
you’re going to arrive at a destination called SUCCESS some day. There’s no destination by that name. It exists not. You, however, do exist – and you’re here to have a successful journey of both ups and downs – but mostly UPS. Enjoy ’em all.

3 Words of Advice

August 11, 2014 by Matt Furey

In yesterday’s email, “Laundry in the Ghetto” – I mentioned that while in the Bahamas, my son played a couple baseball games inside the grounds
of a prison. Today, let me elaborate…

On the afternoon of the championship, as parents and fans sat in attendance, a man who looked to be in his mid-50’s, sat behind the backstop wearing striped black-and-white pants.

What was he doing there?

He was announcing the game.

No, he wasn’t giving the names and positions of players. He was literally announcing what was happening on the field, out loud, for all to hear, as if he was on the radio.

He was filled with joy and laughter, having what appeared to be the time of his life. Perhaps it was. Then again, after speaking to him for a few seconds later on, I’m not so sure.

The prisoner used breaks in the action to give updates on LeBron James going back to Cleveland and the San Antonio Spurs hiring Becky Hammon, the first female to coach in the NBA.

He called the game right along with the umpire, but with much more detail.

“Strike one looking. And it was right down the pipe.”

“Three up, three down. Just like that folks.”

“Oh, he got a hold of that one. Knocked it all the way down to the Florida panhandle.”

And so on.

At times the man laughed out loud – showing great elation for the job he was allowed to do. At no time did he ever attempt to escape the scorching sun. And as soon as one game ended, he began announcing the next … ALL DAY LONG.

When our game ended, I walked his way and flashed a “thumbs up.” He smiled. The energy from his smile covered the whole ball field.

“Great job announcing,” I said. “Really enjoyed listening to you today.”

“Thank you. Thank you,” he said.

Then he uttered three words that struck me in the heart center.

“PEACE AND LOVE,” he beamed.

And before I could reply he repeated himself.

“PEACE AND LOVE.”

Hmmm. Made me wonder what the man was in prison for. Made me wonder if he’ll ever get out. Made me wonder why he’s still a prisoner.

The dude MEANT what he said MORE than anyone I’ve ever heard utter these type of words before.

His words weren’t a hollow, empty “love and light” slogan. They weren’t words from a hippy or do-nothing.

He didn’t just say “love” – or only say “peace.”

He gave both to me – in reverse order.

“PEACE AND LOVE.”

Made me think.

Why not “love” first?

Well, it’s not easy to love when there’s no peace, right?

So first and foremost, let’s have peace. And where there is peace, we can have love.

Love without peace isn’t love.

Where fighting exists, there doesn’t appear to be much of either.

Yet, this man found both INSIDE a prison.

He may never see another day outside this prison – yet in spite of this, he’s filled with joy. And he’s given priviliges no other prisoner enjoys.

Somebody took note of WHO this man is on the inside. He changed who he is – and whether he ever gets out or not – he knows that he
already IS.

He may live inside a prison, but no one and no thing is keeping him from being a beam of goodness for all to see. And he’s totally free to say…

“PEACE and LOVE.”

Three words of advice worth embodying. One person at a time. One breath at a time. One thought at a time.

Best,

Matt Furey

Laundry in the Ghetto

August 10, 2014 by Matt Furey

Do I EVER have a story for you. This one is called … “Laundry in the Ghetto.”Before I get to it, a little update. You haven’t heard from me in awhile, and that’s because I spent almost the entire summer with my son, training him and then traveling from one baseball tournament to another.We were in Ft. Myers, FL, Omaha, NE, San Diego, CA, Atlanta, GA, Orlando, FL – and then the grand finale, Nassau, Bahamas – wherein we played a couple of our games inside the grounds of a prison, TRUE – playing the Bahamian National Team.It’s been a great summer, and now I’m finally at home, sleeping in my own bed, working out in my own quarters, and getting back to this thing called “work.’

I feel a bit like a school teacher – taking a couple months off – but the fruit that is to come from doing so is going to be sweet indeed.

Anyway, on to today’s feature story….

Laundry in the Ghetto

This past Wednesday, as five days of laundry began to ripen – I asked a lady at the Information desk in the Coral Towers Hotel in Nassau, Bahamas, where I could find a drop-off “fluff and fold” laundromat.

She told me where to go, but frankly, with my heavy accent, I couldn’t make out what she was saying. I asked her if she’d write the address for me on a slip of paper. She obliged and told me to hand the address to the taxi.

“WULFF ROAD” was the address – and this alone should have probably given me a clue, even if it wasn’t misspelled.

El taxi told me it was a LONG WAY to this particular laundramat. This was “Code” for telling me he was going to charge me an outrageous $25.00 fee for a rather short ride.

This particular taxi driver, like almost all the taxi drivers here in the Bahamas had the Holy Bible close at hand. In the male-operated taxi’s, It’s either next to their seat or on the dash, and I beileve it gives the impression… or the illusion of honesty.

Before dropping me off, Mr. Taxi went to great lengths to tell me how he grew up in “the projects” – and how there are laundramats there as well, and cheaper – but in his opinion, not safe.

My goodness, he was really looking out for me.

A few blocks from my desitnation the driver further verified that I was in a safe area BECAUSE the police station would be directly across from me.

Super. Thank you so very, very much.

I negotiated the laundry fee for wash, dry and fold. Twas twenty bucks. A fair deal in my opinion.

Per the driver’s recommendation I glided next door to nab some grub at a take-out joint called the Bamboo Shack.

As I ordered my food and waited, more and more people showed up.

I was the only white boy in the area – and everyone was friendly – or at the very worst, neutral.

Even so, I opened the eyes on the back of my head, focused on my breathing and relaxed any tension I felt into calmness.

Ah. No worries.

After getting my food I walked back toward the laundry, passed it by and sat before an abandoned unit right next door. This placed me directly – mean eyeball-to-eyeball, across from the police station.

Not a worry in the whirld as fellow Bahamians pulled up and walked in front as well as behind me.

After beginning my meal two cops meandered over and began an interrogation.

“Hello sir, where you from?” asked the Sgt.

“I’m from Florida.”

“Okay, Why are you here?”

“I’m doing my laundry next door.”

“Why are you in town?”

“My son is playing baseball in a tournament over here.”

“Where you staying?”

“Coral Towers.”

“How much longer you gonna be here?”

“The lady doing my laundry said it would take an hour and ten minutes.”

I answered so politely that they nodded at me, turned and walked away.

A few minutes later the two cops returned, asking me to come across the street for protection.

“But I was told this area is safe,” I said.

With bugged-out eyes the Sgt laughs and says, “SAFE? Who the hell told you that? There are crimes here all the time. This is the ghetto, man. And you’re a fish outta water. It only takes about 30-40 seconds to commit a crime and run – and in the Bahamas track is our best sport.”

This was stunning information – but not enough to rattle my calm state. Although I waswatching my breath, feeling fearless and thinking good thoughts, I thought it might be a good idea to do as advised anyway, so I willingly walked across the street to the police station.

“You’re welcome to sit inside or out,” said the Sgt.

Something about going inside didn’t feel right, so I plopped my rumpus on a light blue concrete bench to the right of the doors.

The Sgt. stood facing traffic as we talked. Over the course of the next 90 minutes there were no colors or races. He was there to protect and serve. ME.

And while doing so he gave me the scoop on Bahamian culture, history, etc.

“Why did the taxi bring you here?” he asked. “He oughta know better.”

“I gave him a slip of paper with the address that was given to me by a lady at Coral Towers.”

“What was she thinking? Man, this is nuts. Why didn’t the taxi take you to Bayshore? There’s places to do laundry there that are totally safe.”

“Don’t know,” I said.

“You know what we call white people over here?” the Sgt. asks.

“No idea.”

“We call you Conchy Joe’s – after the white-shelled conch we eat over here.”

I smiled.

“So, if you don’t mind my asking, what do you do for a living?”

“I write books, programs and create DVDs on fitness, martial arts and such,” i said.

“Any best-sellers?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“By the looks of your ears, you’ve seen some big competition.”

“I won a world title in China,” I said.

“”Oh really?” he said, then paused, took a deep breath and said, “So, maybe you could protect US more than we can protect YOU?”

“You just never know,” I replied. “Anything can happen. It all depends.”

We spoke about much more and when my clothes were finished the police sergeant drove me back to my hotel.

As I opened the door I debated what to do. To tip or not to tip, that was the question.

This was the ONE TIME in Nassau wherein someone did something to help me and I wasn’t being billed a thing. Everywhere you go, gratuities are NOT a choice. They’re mandatory.

Wherever you go to eat, 15% is already added to your bill. And adding insult to sleep time, I stayed in a Hilton for two nights – and was billed $10.00 per night, auto-gratuity… for the MAID. I wonder if she ever sees a nickle of that gratutiy. I’m leaning toward a “no” on that one.

“I’d like to send you a ‘thank you’ gift,” I said to the officer. May I have the correct spelling of your name and address?”

After typing “Sgt. Stephan Moultrie” into my smart-device, the question still nagged me.

“I’m very grateful for your help,” I said. “What do I owe you?”

“You owe me nothing, man,” he said.

Peeling back a couple bills from my wad, I handed him a generous tip.

“This is for you, my friend. I’ll never forget you. Expect a package from me, and be sure to thank your boss for me.”

“He’s the one who told me to look out for you. The last thing we need here is an attack on a foreign tourist. Not good for business, ya know.”

“I can imagine,” I said. “If something happened to me, there might be a few people upset.”

He smiled. “Take care, my friend. And if you ever want to come visit me, you know my name and where I work. I’m there from 6 PM to 2 AM every day.”

“Thanks again,” I said, waving goodbye.

Even though there are plenty of “shoulds” in this story, I’m truly grateful for the ENTIRE experience. Learned a lot.

Personally, I thought I’d be safe sitting by myself, waiting outside for my laundry. But the heavens must have disagreed – so Sgt. Moultrie was sent my way.

There are many “take-aways” in this story as well. The one that strikes me most profoundly is the imporance of being “cool, calm and collected” – even if you’re in a dangerous place.

This sense of calmness is what I’ve learned by studying Zero Resistance Living and Theatre of the Mind. Calmness makes everything in life turn out better than it would have. Tension is the enemy. Rid it from your mind and body on a daily
basis.

If you can use some of this calmness in your life – I suggest you get these stellar programs NOW.

Best,

Matt Furey

When the Worst is the Best

June 24, 2014 by Matt Furey

Those who’d like to see “proof” of something bad actually being good – and how we can’t be too sure we know the answer – may appreciate the following true story about “satori” or an “awakening” happening in the coaching of a sport like baseball.

Hold on.

If you’re not a baseball fan, hang with me for a bit as this is too good to ignore.

Okay, in baseball there are a lot of terms to describe how the batter hits the ball. Setting aside the obvious “home run” and “grand slam” – there are three main categories:

1. ground balls
2. line drives
3. fly balls

A home run or grand slam can be hit in all three ways – although it’s rare for it to be from a ground ball.

Even so, in each of the three categories you have picturesque words to describe HOW the ball was hit – as well as opinions from coaches, players and fans as to whether or not they approve.

For example, here are some terms under each category:

1. Ground ball – sharp, soft, dribbler, chopper, bunt, slow roller, etc.

2. Line drive – hard, soft, missile, laser, pill, shot, gapper, etc

3. Fly ball – infield fly, blooper, Texas leaguer, can of corn, deep, shallow, monster shot, bomb, etc.

Believe it or not, there are many coaches who bash the home run and the deep fly ball. Some even dislkike the line drive. And there are those who
despise the ground ball.

Anyway, one coach who was ahead of the pack, viewed the game differently. He liked hard line drives, sharp ground balls as well as deep fly balls that leave the ball park. He didn’t care how the ball got hit – so long as you “hit it hard.”

At the same time, this coach was adamant about the type of ground ball, line drive or fly ball he wanted. He absolutely hated soft ground balls, choppers, dribblers and so on.

“If you’re going to hit the ball,” he’d say, “hit it square and mash it.”

Well, one day in a game when the score was tied, 1-1, late in the game, this coach’s team was up to bat.

The bases were loaded with two outs and the young man at the plate had home run hitting power as well as the ability to scorch some hard line drives into a gap.

But lately everything this player hit was a chopper – a ground ball that almost always ended up being an easy out.

The day before the coach chided this player for not making solid contact, for hitting so many choppy ground balls.

Here’s where it gets interesting. In this tie-ballgame something strange happened. The batter swung and hit the ball as hard as he could but it only traveled one foot before hitting the ground.

The ball chopped into the ground close to home plate.

It hit the grass so hard you’d think it’d cause a geyser. The pitcher and catcher didn’t know what to do for a millisecond – then there was a diving sprint to catch the ball and get the third out at home plate.

The pitcher dove to his stomach. No catch. But he had his hand on the ball. From his gut he relayed the ball to the catcher.

He was a hair too late. The run scored and the batter who chopped the ball was safe at first.

No more runs were scored it that game. It ended in a 2-1 victory for the coach. But something more happened inside the mind of the coach.

Afterward he went to the boy who hit the ball “wrong.”

He smiled and shook his hand.

“Nice chopper,” he said. “Yesterday I condemned the very thing that won today’s game. I’ve learned a very important lesson from today’s game and I thank you for opening my eyes.”

The next day the coach no longer condemned the chopper in practice.

“Nine times out of ten the chopper is not what you want. But who knows,” he said. “Sometimes the home run is robbed with a leaping grab and the hard line drive is caught for a double play.”

“Sometimes the worst hit ball is exactly what’s needed to win a game. It ends up being the best hit ball for that particular situation. It’s a great metaphor for life. Be careful what you condemn – it might be exactly what you need to win the game.”

Days later the team noted how the coach was a different man. He was calmer, more relaxed and much more open to anything being possible. The team improved faster because he wasn’t absolutely certain that he always knew, in advance, what was good and what wasn’t.

He understood and was awakened to the reality that sometimes the worst is the best, and not just in baseball. In life itself.

Best,

Matt Furey

P.S. There’s a whole lot more that’ll awaken you in Theatre of the Mind.

Why LeBron and the Heat Got Extinguished

June 16, 2014 by Matt Furey

It’s not every year I get excited watching the NBA Championships but this year and last definitely got my attention

Even though basketball is not my sport and I cannot tell you a whole lot about the in’s and out’s of the game, I can accurately comment on what is inherent in ALL sports, all endeavors, all contests. I can quickly and readily see who has more guts, more desire, more “want to win.”

This year, unlike last season, there was no seven-game series. There were only five games; only four of them were “contests.” There was only ONE close game. And there was only ONE team who wanted to win so badly you could see sparks flying off them.

When I watched the Heat get blown out in Miami, not once, but two-straight times, my son and I commented on how defeated and dejected they looked. This was not the same team we saw a year earlier. And the San Antonio Spurs were not the same team either.

In all my years of watching basketball, it would be hard to find a better example of three important winning factors:

1. Hunger – to say the Spurs wanted to win more than the Heat would be an understatement. LeBron James said, “It’s just basketball,” on Saturday – and that pretty much summed up how the Heat played.

To the Spurs, it wasn’t just a game. It wasn’t just basketball. It was an opportunity that must be seized NOW. It was a salve that would remove or heal the wound they felt deep inside their guts after losing to the Heat a year ago.

In post game interveiws, Tim Duncan said that he never forgot the pain from last year”s loss – and used it as motivation to win it all this year.

I never thought I’d see the day when LeBron James lacked an abundance of desire – but it was evident in this series. In almost all contests, LeBron had sufficient desire. And normally what he brought to the table in this championship series would be more than adequate.

It’s just that the Spurs had an “off-the-charts” level of desire. They went to the quantum level of desire – and the Heat were woefully unprepared to match them. And how could they? It’s not very often we witness what we saw in this series. It was hunger, it was desire, nonpareil.

2. Teamwork – in most team sports, you have leaders, you have stars whom the others follow. The star is the one who wants the ball when it comes down to crunch time. He’s the one who loves being put in the “do-or-die” spotlight.

The Spurs have their stars – but the entire team played the game at such at high level of intensity, passing the ball like I’ve never seen – with speed and precision – until they found an great shot. And it didn’t matter WHO had the great shot. Any player on the court would do. As my friend, Nick Nurse, assistant coach with the Toronto Raptors, said, “They passed up good shots to take great shots.”

3. Humility – now this is where I must doff my hat, shoes and entire wardrobe to the Spurs. This is where every young athlete in the whirld could take note and gain something of immense value.

Look for a shred of humility with the Heat. I dare you. You’ll be looking a long, long time. It’s not that they have no humility. They do. But it’s hard to see it – EVER. Once the series was over, we saw it. Once they knew there was nothing they could do to stop the Spurs – we saw it.

But not before.

Contrast this with the likes of the Spurs. It starts with Tim Duncan and trickles down to every player. Find a photo of Mr. Dunan – look at him up close. What you’re looking at is a man who needs no “rah-rah” chatter or praise. He needs no strokes. He’s in this game because he loves it.

Regardless of how many points he scores or doesn’t score, his eyes and facial expression are virtually the same. Yes, when he loses he feels pain – and shows it. That’s part of humility as well. No pretense. No arrogance.

Duncan is there to do a job – but at the end of the day, despite the wealth, the fame and the trophies, most importantly, he’s a professional human
being.

He could care less about endorsement deals. He doesn’t need to be the face of a franchise. None of that matters to him.

Back in 1980, when Olympic Speed-Skater Eric Heiden won five gold medals, he could have ridden his fame into the sunset with endorsements. I read an aricle about him that used a headline I remember as follows:

“HEIDEN; WON’T BE JENNERIZED, SPITZIFIED”

And Heiden held true to his word.

is there anything wrong, in my book, to taking endorsement deals?

No.

It’s just that you have to stand back in awe when you meet someone who could care less about any of “that stuff.”

Even though he now has five (5) NBA Championships to his credit, Tim Duncan will probably not enter this discussion on mainstream sports media of being “the greatest ever.”

And I don’t think he cares.

LeBron was right when he said, “It’s just basketball.” He truly was.

On the other hand, to Duncan, he played as if “IT IS and IT ISN’T – just basketball.”

It is and it isn’t.

When you’re on the court – It’s ONLY BASKETBALL. Nothing else in the world exists – or matters. So it IS and it ISN’T at the same time.

It’s isn’t just a game. It’s an opportunity. It’s a moment in time that almost no one on this planet will ever experience. It’s a way to show yourself and prove to yourself that you CAN rise above yourself – you can even rise above the HEAT – and finish in grand glory.

In the Zone. That’s what Duncan and the Spurs were in. The Zone.

You don’t get there by thinking, “It’s just basketball.”

You get there when you think, “This is DESTINY.”

Congrats Spurs. Condolences Heat.

Thanks to both of you for another great series.

Matt Furey
author of Theatre of the Mind

Man Learns to Write While Driving

June 13, 2014 by Matt Furey

Just received an email from a guy raving about the Tao of Email Copywriting. Here’s what he wrote:

Matt,
Of all the tens of thousdands of dollars I’ve spent, all the hundreds of hours invested, all the books, tapes, cd’s dvd’s and practical experience I’ve gleened over 20 years of sales and marketing experience….

the Tao of Email Copywriting is by far the best. What amazed me is how easily you communicated HOW to write without effort – and how you got everyone to believe you – and then DO IT.

And then, the kicker. Just by listening to your program while driving, my writing ability soared.

Other than the Tao program, I’ve never been exposed to a training that improved my writing so quickly…

AND EFFORTLESSLY!!!

It’s like all the other copywriting programs promise, only you deliver.

I’m not sure how you have this kind of effect on people, including me. I guess that’s why we call you the “Zen Master.”

Your program is more like a download than a “training.”

Thank you, thank you, and thank you a third time.

Oh, and I guess I should include a “by the way.” I’ve made much more than hundreds of thousands of dollars using your method – I’ll just keep it at that.

Everte Farnell

M.F.: Thank you, Everte. It’s an awesome wonder to experience, isn’t it? You’re 100% right on. Listen to what to do and how to do it while driving. Absorb the message and let your sub-conscious take over when you’re before a keyboard or yellow pad. That’s how it worketh.

Embarrassing

June 12, 2014 by Matt Furey

Earlier today I was training with two fellow martial artists – both of whom are incredibly good at what they do. I’m practically new to their style, so the learning curve is large indeed.

Toward the end of the class I was given an exercise that I have never felt comfortable doing. Hint: That may mean it’s good for me.

At the same time, I am usually given minimal instruction when we do this exercise – then it’s “Ready, go.”

The two I was training with have been doing this particular drill for years – yet, it’s new to me. As of this moment, I get beat at it every single time.

And it feels downright embarrassing.

After the class I thought about the situation. I keep getting beat at this drill for three reasons;

1. Lack of knowledge – I don’t know what the others know – and they’re not exactly helping to fill in the gaps.

2. Lack of experience – I have only done this drill a few times in my life – the others have done it thousands of times.

3. No strategy – Because this drill is new to me, I lack knowledge on how to do it as well as the experience gained from having done it countless times. Without knowledge and experience, it’s hard to conceive of a battle plan, a simple strategy allowing me to play the game more effectively.

When I got home I sat on the couch.

But not to vegetate – to ruminate.

I began to think in earnest about how I keep getting beat and how much I hate it. And as I thought about it I came up with a few options:

A. Quit – this is the easy thing to do. It’ll help me avoid feelings of letdown and embarrassment – but those feelings will aire their uglness again as soon as I begin to try something else new – and it proves difficult, too.

B. Avoid – keep training but avoid this weakness. Do only the things I’m good at or feel comfortable doing. This will help me avoid feeling bad.

C. Become Fascinated – Instead of being embarrassed, start asking questions. Make no time to concentrate or think about my emotional state. Put my intention on a goal that’s worthy of achieving. Don’t let lack of direction or instruction stop me. Sit and ponder on my own and ask everyone I know who “owns” this skill for help. Put ego out of the way and make this drill a highly refined championship level skill.

In case you’re wondering, I’ll be choosing “Option C.”

Now, in case you’re wondering if I’ve ever gone through the “let down” phase before, I assure you it’s come and gone many, many times.

It’s part of learning – at least for me.

Sure, there are those “positive thinkers” who claim they have no ego, that they never feel embarrassed, etc.

All I can say is this: If you’ve ever achieved anything great, you got embarrassed along the way – and this lit a spark that helped lead you to greatness.

I don’t know a single “success” who never felt humiliated or embarrassed or horrified. Not one.

As Coach Dan Gable used to say, “The only place you start at the top is digging a hole.”

The same holds true for writing, running or river rafting. You get good by doing – AND by thinking about doing BETTER.

You picture better days. You practice so you can have better days – and eventually they will come your way.

Best,

Matt Furey

P.S. In The Tao of Email Copywriting – I do something most marketers never do. I willingly and openly teach you what I know, I tell you of my
experiences – AND I give you several strategies you can begin using NOW to improve the sales of ANYTHING you are offering. Whether it’s a book, a line of supplements, clothing or exercise equipment – email is still the very best way to put your message out there and create the life you want. Grab your future NOW.

Backwards: The Other 95%

June 11, 2014 by Matt Furey

Back in 1995, when I first learned how to “finally” write a book and get it published, I was shocked to hear the following two statements being made:

1. Writing a book is the easy part.

2. 95% of creating a best-seller is the marketing – not the actual writing of the book.

Hmmm, I thought. I got it all backwards. I figured that writing a book was 95% of the process in creating a best-seller. Now I’m learning that I’ve got the numbers flip-flopped. Writing the book is only 5% of the process.

In virtually everything I’ve ever been involved in, creating a winner, becoming a champion, getting good at something, etc. – in the beginning, I always had the percentages wrong.

The 95% was 5% and the 5% was 95%.

When it comes to creating a book/DVD or course of some kind, I can assure you that my earliest mentors were correct.

Writing a book is the easy part.

Now, this may derail some. Those who think that writing a book is hard, hard work don’t know the shortcuts or the secrets to doing it – and/or they have no gauge to compare their efforts to because they don’t engage in marketing of any sort.

Writing a book can be done in a weekend – or in a day. I wrote Combat Conditioning in a week. I wrote 101 Ways to Magnetize Money in Any Economy in a single day.

I wrote Expect to Win – Hate to Lose over a period of several years. That may sound like drudgery, but it was truly quite simple. I wrote one column per month for a martial arts magazine. The column took me about an hour to write. After six years, I compiled the columns into a book – then edited them.

Voila. Instant book – six years in the making – one hour at a time – once a month.

As for DVDs, I’ve shot most of them in an hour or two. I trained myself to be a “one-take” guy. I know what I’m going to say – in a general sort of way – and then I say it.

Done.

Finished.

Now someone else can edit the DVD for me.

Okay, so how then do I market what I’ve created?

There are many ways – but the KING of all methods is still what I championed years ago: e-mail.

There are right ways and wrong ways to write emails to promote your product or service.

Most people follow the wrong way. They send boring, dull, image-driven drivel that quickly goes into the trash.

Then there are the great emails you read – the ones that have a connection of some sort to “yours truly.”

These are the emails that are personal.

They give you a glimpse of what life is like inside the walls of the writer’s office or abode.

Emails that follow the Furey Method are “simply irresistible.” Once you start reading you can’t stop.

And do you know what? Writing a simple email like the one you’re reading right now – looks incredibly easy.

And it is – ONCE you learn the thinking and the creative tension and structure that goes into each one.

Entrepreneurs and best-selling authors from all over the whirld own a copy of The Tao of Email Copywriting that Sells. They listen to it again and again – and then they get busy writing emails to their list.

When they do this, the 95% starts to shrink. It begins to feel more like 5%. Ah, such a simple thing. All I gotta do is get on it and stay on it – day in and day out.

What’s really cool is that the emails you write – overtime, become a collection that can become yet another book.

Huh? You kidding me? Nope. I know several best-selling authors who wrote their emails first. They had no book to begin with.

From their emails/blogs, they developed a following – and after writing a considerable number of pieces that “popped” – the emails were assembled into a book that sells.

Wow.

So you don’t need a book to start writing emails – and you definitely need to start writing emails if you already have a book.

And there’s no finer way to learn how than T he Tao of Email Copywriting that Sells.

I have a friend who sends his daily emails to a list of just over 1,000 people. Not only do these people buy his books but they’re beating down his doors to train with him.

Several of my friends and clients are doctors. They’ve used emails to sell books, supplements, coaching programs and seminars before thousands of raving fans.

What a way to live.

Get up. Breathe. Write an email. Reap rewards that go beyond space and time.

If you don’t already own a copy of The Tao of Email Copywriting that Sells, then I strongly suggest you claim your copy today. It may change the way you think, write and LIVE – forever.

Best,

Matt Furey

P.S. I should point out that this isn’t a program for M.D.s or PhD’s. Goodness gracious no. Many of my top followers, friends and clients didn’t even
go to college – and they’re raking in the mongubwas (a term I just coined – literally, right now).

Think of it:

All of our lives we’ve heard this crap that “you gotta go to college to get a good job.”

Really?

The way I see it, you have options: You can by-pass the $100,000 student loan program as well as the partial or full scholarships. You can bypass the years of drinking and drugging and “horsing” around.

You can go straight to the essence of what makes people and societies move – WORDS and the energy they contain.

Discover how to use WORDS as well as the energy behind them in The Tao of Email Copywriting that Sells.

Get yours NOW.

Controversial: To Spank or Not to Spank

Controversial: To Spank or Not to Spank

No Such Thing as Success or Failure

3 Words of Advice

Laundry in the Ghetto

When the Worst is the Best

Why LeBron and the Heat Got Extinguished

Man Learns to Write While Driving

Embarrassing

Backwards: The Other 95%

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