Rise Above Pain, Frustration and Failure with the Magic Power of Psycho-Cybernetics and
Theatre of the Mind
Self-Image Exercises Tap the Unlimited Resources of Your Subconscious Mind
Welcome to the Official Site of Psycho-Cybernetics and Theatre of the Mind. This is where we do as the good doctor, Maxwell Maltz, did for so many years. We heal internal scars. We give you an emotional face lift. We transform the agonizing pain of defeat, failure, frustration and loneliness into courage, confidence, love, gratitude and peace of mind. We help you reach your goals by showing you how to remove the obstacles that you think are standing in your way.
As a reconstructive plastic surgeon, Dr. Maltz realized that although “plastic surgery” benefited 0.5% of the population, the other 99.5% had unresolved emotional scars from the past, and that these could be removed by changing your self-image. Once these internal scars were irradiated, what followed was a life of success and happiness with you reaching “the greatest port in the world: peace of mind.”
On this blog, I will be giving you Psycho-Cybernetics success tips for transforming your self-image, as well as making recommendations on books, courses and seminars that will take you to the next level. Make sure you subscribe to our email list as well because we have special offers that you’ll want to see.
Matt Furey, President, Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation, Inc.
March 25th, 2014
Worried about the future? Obsessing about the past? Fearful of how things might turn out? Feeling bad about making mistakes or failing to accomplish some goal? Angry about some injustice inflicted upon you?
There’s a quick way to get out of these vicious emotional cycles.
I like to call it living “One Breath at a Time.”
Not living “one day at a time.”
Not living in “day tight compartments.”
It’s living one breath at a time AS you live one day at a time – or as you focus on goals you want in the future.
It’s a very simple process. It really is.
But simple is often made complicated and difficult.
Because it’s hard to trim away the fat and get to the bone and sinew of what makes something work.
Give someone a simple formula for anything, then watch the person try to add his own twist to the matter. Simple now has
Simple is good – and if you want to repeat something good, keep it simple.
Show me simplicity and I’ll show you focused, deliberate power. Show me something complicated and we’ll see confusion.
Truth is you only get one breath at a time. You don’t get two at a time. You don’t get three or more.
You don’t get to hang on to yesterday’s breath and you cannot prepare for tomorrow’s. You can only take one breath at a time – so why not do your best to live that way?
Sakai Yusai, the late Tendai Buddhist marathon monk – whom I wrote about in Expect to Win – Hate to Lose, told me how he accomplished the grueling 100 Days of Non-Stop Walking feat.
Huh? 100 days of non-stop walking? That’s right. Walking for 100 days straight without sleep, without sitting and without lying down.
He was allowed to eat – but could not sit as he did so. Instead, he could lean against a pole until he finished his meal. And as soon as he finished, he went back to walking.
Any Tendai monk who is given this seemingly impossible task, walks in-doors, in a special room, for 100 days.
Sakai Yusai said that the feat was very difficult the first two days. He didn’t believe he could make it. His mind was filled with worry and self-doubt.
Then he tapped into the power of his breathing. He focused on nothing but his breath. After he did this, the Master said the rest of the feat was “EASY.”
Wait a moment. Let me get this straight. The first two days were pure agony, but the next 98 were EASY because you found a way to breathe?
That’s right. That’s what he told me.
There’s a reason the Japanese proclaimed Sakai Yusai a “Living Buddha.”
I was fortunate to meet him in Japan, at his home, in 2007. I was fortunate yet again to have him come to the U.S. to visit me and take part in a seminar I held in 2008.
“Live every day as if it is your whole life,” he said. When I asked for him to elaborate on that one, he said that you wouldn’t think of putting on yesterday’s dirty socks to wear again today. So why bring yesterday’s trauma into today? You have a whole new life. Everyday. Remember the good times and bring those with you – but leave the negative past behind. Breathe it away.
I’m so fired up about this subject that I’m going to hold a bonus teleseminar for everyone who gets the NEW Theatre of the Mind package – and I’m going to have this teleseminar next week. Details to follow.
If you’ve already ordered your copy of the NEW Theatre of the Mind – (not the solo DVD that was offered a year ago), you can include yourself in this bonus offering. If you haven’t gotten it yet – there’s still time.
Be one of the next 138 people to order and I’ll include you in the bonus teleseminar.
Jump on this NOW, my friend. It’s going to be AWESOME.
March 24th, 2014
The unsolicited testimonials keep rolling in on my newest program, making me one happy camper.
Here’s one that left me in awe:
I have listened and learned from some of the greatest self help gurus on the planet, both living and dead. I can honestly say that all of them made meaningful contributions to my success and my happiness.
I can also honestly say that I have never done what I am doing now. Not once. Not before this. Not ever. I sent you a testimonial over a week ago on your Theatre of the Mind program – but before you use it I want to send you a revised testimonial. A second one.
Why? Because I have grown by using it in a time frame most would consider impossible. It has been only 3 weeks since I got the course and I have been entranced to use it every single day like no other course has ever engaged me. I just keep re-listening to it and doing your exercises.
They’re easy, effortless and are taking me to a whole new level. The people who have shown up and the business opportunities that have presented themselves as a result are beyond anything I have ever had happen.
Many people may already think of me as successful – afterall, I wrote a best-seller and speak all over the world. So they might think something like your course could not make such a huge difference. Well, they’d be wrong.
So let me say this: No matter where are in life – successful or lost, you need Theatre of the Mind and you need it now. Get it learn it and live it like I did for the past 21 days and you will be transformed in a way that you have never experienced and cannot experience anywhere else. If you care one iota about yourself and your loved ones honor yourself and give yourself 21 days of daily exposure to your own Theatre of the Mind, guided by Matt.
You will emerge transformed, happy and on a far better road than you can even imagine now.”
Dave Woynarowski, M.D.
author of The Immortality Edge
MJF: Thank you, Dr. Dave. This makes my week. Keep me posted on all the good things coming your way.
P.S. One of the special bonus CDs in the package, entitled See Yourself at Your Best, will take you to heights you’ve never conceived of before. And it’ll do so effortlessly, regardless of your field or endeavor.
March 19th, 2014
Ever been around someone who absolutely must be the “smartest” person in the room?
I call this type of person a SPITR – and that’s pretty much what he or she does; spits on everyone in the room.
You know the guy I’m talking about.
Whenever you and your friends are talking, he’ll listen briefly – (and I mean very, very briefly.)
He’ll then proceed to position himself as most knowledgeable amongst all in the room.
He’ll interrupt and begin arguments with openers like, “That’s not true.” Or, “that’s not what really happened.” Or he’ll feel the need to pile on until his information trumps all others.
I know a lady who couldn’t even be introduced without making a comment that denigrated the person introducing her.
“John, I’d like you to meet Jane. She’s the one I told you about who does acupuncture and deep tissue massage to eliminate pain from old injuries.”
Before John can even say hello, Jane “fixes” the introduction.
“Actually, what I do,” she says, “is Tuina massage combined with acupressure and a bit of Reiki, feng shui and tarot card reading.”
Intro killed. Just had to “correct” the introduction before it barely got off the ground. Had to be a SPITR.
I know a guy who can’t stand to not know something about a topic others are discussing or someone is teaching. He’ll keep quiet for a day or two, during which time he’s searching the Internet or the local library to find the one thing about the subject you don’t know yet. And he cannot wait to tell you what he knows that you don’t.
He will NEVER approach you and ask you what you know on the subject. That would downgrade his
SPITR status. He must appear all-knowing, even if the mirage requires staying up for a week to research your area of expertise.
Another SPITR symptom is trying to out-think the master. Even though the SPITR is a complete beginner in a new course of action, he will not allow himself to “listen, believe and apply.”
Instead, he must reinvent the computer. He must prove he can outsmart those whose knowledge he could really use.
Earlier today I had a coaching call with a client. He asked for details about a financial turning point I had many years ago.
I told him that “paying yourself first” regardless of bills and debts was key. I mentioned how you need to take 10 percent of every check and put it away. I repeated the W. Clement Stone maxim, “If you don’t have the saving habit, the seeds of greatness are not within you.”
Then I mentioned that I’ve stated this very truth at seminars for at least the last 12 years. I recounted how this advice is from a man who started with nothing and became a billionaire.
Yet, despite his credentials. how many people who hear the message will follow his sage advice. Very few.
Some refuse to picture themselves saving 10 percent. It’s not part of their self-image. These people are the “I can’t do that’s.”
Then there are the SPITR’s. They immediately try to figure out a ‘better way.” They’ll spends hours, days, even weeks trying to out-think the billionaire.
Years later, guess what? The SPITR is no better off.
This is why I say the SPITR is actually the dumbest person in the room (DPITR).
Now, you may wonder why a person would choose to be a SPITR when it should be obvious to him that he’s getting DPITR results.
Well, just because something “should” be obvious doesn’t make it so.
Once again, it all comes down to self-image. The SPITR feels compelled to argue, fix and overwhelm with his vast knowledge because deep down he feels bad about being a DPITR.
So a SPITR is really a DPITR. A wolf in sheep’s clothing.
And the real fix is so simple: Shut up and listen.
After you’ve done that, learn what to do, picture yourself doing it, then do it.
Once you’ve been doing it for some time and you’ve got a track record, then you can make modifications.
Putting wings in front of the bird’s head doesn’t work. You might try to out-think the Creator on this truth. But you’ll only prove yourself foolish for trying.
Whenever you catch yourself being a SPITR, and virtually all of us do from time to time, remind yourself that you won’t learn much when you’re spitting. You’ll learn much more when you’re listening, asking, listening, asking and ultimately acting on what you discover.
P.S. For information on changing your self-image, go here.
P. P. S. For information on my coaching services, click here.
March 18th, 2014
Imagine your son is being scouted by several MLB teams. And on the day the scouts show up to watch him play – he strikes out four times. He fails utterly.
What do you think would come of such a thing?
Well, one scout went back to the office and said to draft this player in the 1st round.
Because he showed the same “face” when he struck out as he did when hitting a home run.
Bottom line: He handled failure professionally in a game that has a lot of it. And that doesn’t happen by accident. It requires training in the mental game.
How do you handle failure? What’s your attitude when you make a mistake?
If it isn’t a reaction that is cool, calm and collected, then you need to make a shift; you need Theatre of the Mind and you need it NOW.
Claim your copy here.
P. S. By the way, the player was Chipper Jones. He’ll most likely be a first-year Hall-of-Famer, too.
March 15th, 2014
One of the cardinal rules of successful living is to “see yourself with kind eyes.”
This means you must let go of frustration, disappointment, mistakes, setbacks and failures. To see yourself with kind eyes means you stop criticizing and condemning yourself for what you “should” have done – “could” have done – and “would” have done.
A favorite Wayne Dyer line to keep close to your lips goes as follows: “You can never SHOULD have done anything.”
If your son or daughter misses a free throw and you say, “You should have made that one,” – you are talking in moronic
language. You cannot go back into the past and re-do your missed basket.
If you don’t make a sale, you are using guilt to your disadvantage if you say, “You should have said x,y,z.” Again, you cannot go back and re-do mistakes. So the guilt of “should” serves no function other than to keep you stuck.
Such is the way it is in the physical world.
But in the world of the mind – you can actually turn your “should have” to your advantage.
You CAN go back and fix the past. It’s nothing but a mental movie or series of snapshots anyway. And you’re the star, director, producer and script writer.
So why not go back and re-do the past? Why not have things turn out the way you’d like them to turn out.
If you’ve always been afraid to hike mountains, why not go back and see yourself hiking a mountain courageously?
If you always get upset when someone calls you a certain name, or asks you a “dumb” question, why not go back and relive your reaction, then change it?
You change it in the present. In the NOW – which doesn’t last very long. And with each new now, you stay the course, you keep focused on how you’re going to do things or react to comments or situations from now on.
As a coach, my job is to reflect reality so that those whom I teach can see what they were missing, and change it.
There is no flattery. There’s no apple polishing. There’s no telling a person what he or she wants to hear so he’ll keep being a client.
At the same time, there’s no guilt or negative judgment. A person has already done what’s he’s done. He cannot re-do it. But he can change how he feels about the past and move forward with a renewed zest and passion for life.
Last night I worked with a young man who sent me a “mind movie” he’d made some time ago. None of what he had in his movie had taken place. In fact, he’d gone backward.
I only watched the first segment. I’d seen enough. And I instantly knew why this man was stuck.
Everything was about having loads of cash, having new cars, a big house and so on.
Nothing wrong with any of the above.
Okay, if that’s the case, why didn’t I like his mind movie? Because there was no gratitude for the past. There was no sense of having accomplished ANYTHING yet in life. Everything was future, future, future.
That my friends, is what distinguishes Theatre of the Mind from all the other programs.
Everything else is gimme, gimme, gimme. I want more, more, more.
Truth is, you can have MORE, with ease, when you get clear on the fact that you already have a lot. You have much to be grateful for – all year round. Every single day. And you have it WITHIN YOU.
What’s more, when you tap into what you have within you – with gratitude – seeing yourself with kind eyes, a whole new universe opens to you.
Yet, instead of recognizing your value and what is already within, most people look to the outside to assess their value. Sad. and true.
Instead of following the sad standard procedure, why not answer the way I’ve depicted it for you in this imaginary dialogue between your conscience (Judge) and your BIG SELF played as YOU:
Judge: “What’s your net worth?”
You: “I’m unable to calculate it right now.”
Judge: “Why not?”
You: “Because it’s too big.”
Judge: “How big is it, approximately?”
You: “It’s infinite.”
You: “Yes, infinite.”
Judge: “And why do you say your net worth is infinite?”
You: “Well, that’s simple. It’s because I have millions upon millions of movie clips in my brain. They’re swimming around with me at all times. And anytime I want to find a really good memory, all I have to do is pull it from the shelf and watch it. When I do this, I instantly feel like a billion bucks. And that’s just from ONE MOVIE. Again, I’ve got millions of these in my memory – and just one of them can bring me a lot of good. Not only that, but each and every day,
more is being added. It’s a non-stop process. So tell me, how can I truly calculate my net worth. So my closest approximation of my net worth is INFINITY.”
My friend, Theatre of the Mind puts you in touch with the INFINITE. Every time you do the practice, you reach into your mind, amplify it’s power and upgrade your physical skills.
You may think, ah, it’s just another self-help program, but the following customer says the following about it:
I’m on my 2nd listen-through. Theatre of the Mind is so good that I cleared my entire bookshelf of all books, DVDs, and audios.
And the only thing that sits on my book shelf is Theatre of the Mind. It looks kind of funny. But it makes everything else I own obsolete.
MJF: Thank you, Jason. That’s some high praise.
Grab your copy of Theatre of the Mind NOW – and make your life into the masterpiece you know it can be.
March 13th, 2014
When I read emails like this I get PUMPED.
Chris, a customer who just finished listening to my ALL NEW Theatre of the Mind program, wrote to express enthusiasm:
GREAT! GREAT! GREAT! GREAT!
Just finished listening to your new Nightingale-Conant Program and man did you nail this one. This will be the first of many times to listen to this. I was driving so wasn’t able to make notes, but still have many things to start in the morning. Plan on sharing with the family.
MJF: Thank you, Chris. I need to listen again and again myself. Dave Kuenstle, the producer at NC, did a marvelous job. He took over 10 hours from live seminars and 8 hours of “in studio” recording. Then he crystallized the message onto 7 audio CDs and a one-hour DVD. It’s truly fantastic. I listened with excitement as I had no idea what was going to make the final cut.
The way Dave put together the seventh CD – truly outstanding. I was wiping tears more than once – and I’m supposed to be more familiar with what I wrote, said and spontaneously ad-libbed than anyone else.
I don’t know how he was able to do it, and I’m in this business. I especially love how he weaves back and forth from LIVE in seminar to LIVE in studio, giving the listener a “yin-yang” sense of the material.
Truly, anyone who is wondering if this program is anything like my others – the answer is YES. It’s LIKE my other programs – AND it’s 10X better than anything else I’ve ever done on my own.
P.S. One more spot available for my Combat Chi Kung Seminar later this month. Grab it and you’re “the man.”
March 6th, 2014
Three years ago next month, Ia client came to see me for H-E-L-P.
He couldn’t really afford the ticket or my fee. He was over $90,000.00 in debt. But he felt he must come see me.
And he arrived on April 15 – of all dates.
At the time he felt as low as a man can feel. He felt inadequate as a father, as an entrepreneur, as a person.
He’s made decisions he now questioned.
Creditors were breathing fire on him. And he expected me to somehow fix everything for him?
Yesterday, I got an email from him. His life changed in a MAJOR way during his visit. And he wanted me to know where he is right now.
Here’s what he wrote:
I’ll never forget the talk we had after you handed me the walking sticks. As we set out on our five-mile journey, there wasn’t much said at first, then you asked, “Okay, so you have some finnacial challenges. What exactly are we talking about here?”
I told you about the debt I had racked up.
“Yeah,” you said.
Then I told you about all the monthly expenses I had and couldn’t meet.
You shrugged those off like they were nothing.
I was mystified at how you were so calm, so relaxed, just breathing as we walked and talked.
I was perplexed as to how you could think all this was no big deal.
I can’t remember much more about our talk. I guess I was in a trance. But something definitely happened to me during that walk. I wasn’t the same person when it ended. What a way to coach people.
Another big shift occurred later in the day. We were in your car and I heard your phone chiming from all the orders you had coming in.
I asked if you had a sale going on.
“No, why?” you said.
“Wow,” I said. “That’s amazing.”
When I returned home I began doing Theatre of the Mind every day without fail. No more doing it one day, then resting for a month. Every single day.
When I had no work on the horizon, I did what you told me to do. I had nothing else to do, and no client work. But I believed what you taught me and applied myself.
This process kept me positive and productive in the face of 90 sum thousand in the RED.
It wasn’t long before I had a few clients. And the few I had turned into MORE. A year later I was in a completely different reality.
Now I run a company with clients all over the world who line up to work with me. Tis pretty bizarre.
I’m almost at the phase you once told me about when you said, “Vince, right now it feels like you have to push a bolder up a hill with everything you’ve got. One day it will feel like all you have to do is tap a stone with your pinky and it will fly up on its own.”
Ahh, such a strong picture to focus on to this day.
Thanks Matt. Thanks Theatre of the Mind.
Author, Athlete, Entrepreneur, Artist and Daddy to 3 great girls
M.J.F. responds: Vince, thank you so much for the update. I’m certain it will inspire many people who’ve walked in similar mocassins. May continued blessings from the heavens and the earth continue to shine upon you.
P.S. If you’d like similar coaching for anything you’d like to make better in your life, there’s a way to get it – and get it NOW.
March 4th, 2014
During the Spring of 2007, a friend and client gave me a birthday gift. ‘Twas an autographed red-white-and-blue basketball.
Not much of a gift for a wrestler and martial artist, eh?
Well, hold on. There was something else. A note written upon the white part of the ball.
The note wasn’t pasted on or taped on. It was written right onto the ball.
It read as follows: “Matt, I’ll be coaching in the NBA before you turn 50.”
Now, this was quite a bold proclamation because this person had never played in the NBA.
Yes, he played in Europe. And coached over there. But the NBA is more than a long flight away from the European leagues.
Within a couple years this man secured a job within the NBA at the D-League level. It’s “kinda like” being a minor league coach in baseball. You may be a better coach than those in the Majors, but you’re not there yet.
So my friend put in his time. Many of his players got so good that they were picked up by the NBA mid-season, leaving him to scramble to find a way to win without the stars who just left.
Even so, he found a way to keep winning.
Year after year.
And then the year he boldly proclaimed came around. The year I would turn 50.
As my birthday neared I received some stunning photos from this man. I received some art work as well.
The photo was from the front page sports section. It showed his team holding a championship trophy. It showed other hands shouting into the air with a “we’re number one” index finger.
And very soon afterward, just around the time of my birthday, the big news came in another personal email. My friend, Nick Nurse, was now coaching in the NBA, with the Toronto Raptors.
I was the only person he told his “mental game” secrets to; the only one he gave a basketball to with his bold proclamation; the only person he even told his goal to.
I kept his goals to myself as well. Didn’t tell anyone what Nick was going to do.
Wouldn’t you like to hear what Nick’s mental game secrets for moving up the seemingly invisible ladder of success are?
I thought so.
You’ll find them in CD #6 in my all-new Theatre of the Mind program. Your jaws will most likely drop when you discover how simple Nick’s technique is – yet how powerful.
As I often say, “The simplest things are the most profound- and oftentimes the most difficult. Not because they’re difficult but because we make them more difficult than they are.”
Writing a simple sentence is supposed to be simple. Yet, most people complicate it.
Shooting a free throw is supposed to be a simple skill. No one in your way. Just take a free shot with no one blocking or defending.
Yet, players make it complicated – and miss.
Speaking in public is simple – yet many people make it so complicated they fear it more than death.
Making something simple complicated is a mental error. And it is corrected first in your mental movie theatre. If no correction is made in your mental movies, then no correction will take place in reality.
Nick Nurse understood this. It worked for him.
Will you let it work for you? Will you let yourself simplify what you’re making complicated.
I’d like to give you a hand – and my new program will show you the way I and so many of my friends and clients have done it.
It’s not complicated – but it is simple as well as profound.
Get the program NOW.
P.S. Some people have asked if the new Theatre of the Mind program is the same as the old program I had on a single DVD. I don’t know how it could be. Last year I released a 30-minute DVD on the subject. Yet this program is over 8 hours on CD, plus an hour on DVD, plus a gratis copy of 101 Ways to Magnetize Money – in Any Economy, plus a workbook. Doesn’t seem possible that someone could think they’re the “same.” But I’ll take the blame for not telling you sooner. They are very, very different. It’s like comparing a high school basketball team to the NBA champions. Big difference. But yes, it’s still just a game with a ball.
P.P.S. I guess I better give the entire name of the program as well, as the subtitle is very instructive. The full title is: Maxwell Maltz’s Theatre of the Mind: Creating Power and Results Through the Magic of Mental Movies.
March 3rd, 2014
This past Saturday I received a call from my friend, Fairfax Hackley, who was with Dan Gable at the Arnold Classic.
Coach Gable was just inducted into the Arnold Classic 2014 Hall of Fame as the “Greatest Olympic Wrestler and Coach in History.”
Fairfax mentioned to Coach Gable that we were good friends. Gable immediately tested to make sure.
“Can you call him right now and get him on the phone?” he asked.
“I can call him and if he doesn’t pick up he’ll call me back,” said Fairfax.
“Will he get back to you right away?” Gable asked.
“Yes, he’ll get back to me right away.”
Fairfax makes the call.
I don’t pick up because I’m with a friend. But I sense the urgency and excuse myself from the table. I call Fairfax back. He says, “I have
someone who’d like to speak to you.”
“Okay,” I reply.
The phone is transferred to someone else. He begins talking.
“Hello Matt,” he says. “How’s everything going?”
“Going great,” I reply.
“You still a kicking butt? You still a big shot?”
I know who this is, I think.
“Well, I’m not the type of person who’s going to refer to himself as a big shot,” i reply.
“But you’re doing okay, right?”
“Yes, we’re doing very okay.”
“Well, I’ve been watching you. You’re not an easy person to follow. Seems like you’re all over the place. And I want you to know that I have a different way of judging my athletes these days. I no longer judge them based upon what they did when they were with me. I judge them based on what they’ve done since they left.”
“Do you know who this is yet?”
“Yes, I do?”
“Okay, who is it?”
“It’s Coach Gable.”
“Ah, very good. How’d you know?”
“I know because you’re still testing me. You were seeing if I’d take the bait and brag on myself.”
“Well, we still have some wrestlers who need to come back to earth. They’re still not there yet.”
[Coach Gable begins to name name’s and tell me, confidentially, whom he’s still watching in the hopes that he’ll get his act together.]
We speak for a few more minutes. Coach Gable, true to the end, does not directly praise me in anyway. It’s not his style. He understands the harm it can do.
Yet, as a result of what he did say, I’m elevated once again. I want to do even better. Not for him, for myself. But knowing that my former
coach is still, in some ethereal way, pulling for me – and all his former athletes, that says a lot. Which means, he will never be a “former”
coach to me or anyone who ever was given the grace to work with him.
Yes. The “grace.”
The great novelist John Irving, once wrote that to be on the mat with Dan Gable was to be in touch with “grace.” Yes, that’s the word he
To get a phone call from him, telling you how he’s still evaluating the talent he recruited, is as well.
In my newest product, Maxwell Maltz’s Theatre of the Mind, I tell many stories about Dan Gable and the influence he had upon me. From his visit to me in the hospital when my face was shattered, to him telling me I didn’t “try very hard” to his method of burning the past to create a vacuum for the future – it’s all in there. And then some.
If you haven’t already gotten this program, I suggest you do so NOW. It will give you the ONE SECRET to success that no one else is addressing. With it, you can do virtually anything. Without it, there isn’t a single self-develpment technique in the world that will help you.
Be Still – and Flow,
P.S. Still think that thinking the wrong thoughts is no big deal, that negativity doesn’t matter. Well, look at this Dan Gable quote. Imagine being 181-0, and this is your very last match in college, for the NCAA title, and this is what you admit to thinking about it:
“All I worrried about was what (Owings) was doing to me, instead of what I was doing to him. When you start worrying about that stuff, you’re going down the wrong path.”
Want to stop worrying about the negative and bring forth the positive, then make sure you get your copy of Maxwell Maltz’s Theatre of the Mind right NOW.
February 28th, 2014
Warning: Today’s message may rattle a few cages. Proceed with caution. Proceed only if you are open to new ways of thinking.
Over the years I’ve written and spoken a number of times about a belief many parents pass on to their children about the importance of getting Straight A’s in school.
If getting Straight A’s is something you and your child want, I’m all for it and can show you how to accomplish this feat with far greater ease, by using Theatre of the Mind – especially the newest and most powerful version of the program, that I recently released with Nightingale-Conant.
On the other hand, I will go on record stating that I do NOT demand that my children get Straight A’s. My wife and I believe that A’s, B’s and an occasional C are fine.
Although my wife is Chinese, neither of us believe the world is going to come to an end if my child gets a “A-” – (an A- is known as the “Chinese F” in many Asian families), much less a B.
Now, truth be told, I often wonder if demanding A’s and B’s is still the wrong approach.
Because you still have to factor in the truth.
Most of the subjects students take in school are not necessarily interesting or exciting to them. And there are some very, very wealthy businessmen who dropped out of school for that reason. In short, they couldn’t take it anymore, so they started Apple, or Microsoft, or Facebook, and so on.
If you’d like to read a good book on this covered-up secret, I suggest The Education of Millionaires: It’s Not What You Think and It’s Not too Late by Michael Ellsberg.
Oh, by the way, the author of the above references “yours truly” in his book, so you really do want to check it out, eh?
Anyway, I’ve always justified our families “A-B grades” philosophy because my wife and I are big believers in being involved in other activities outside of school such as baseball, dancing, piano, paining and martial arts – to name a few.
None of these activities can be learned at a high level in your standard public or private school. If you want to get good at them, you must seek outside coaching.
Now, it turns out that you could choose any one of the “extra” outside interests listed above, and you’ll see a massive amount of interest and excitement.
Make a note, as Emerson said, “Nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm.”
Okay, so that covers a portion of my previous thinking. To me, getting A’s and B’s instead of “only” straight A’s was based upon having other interests.
But now, I’ve changed my tune.
Because when I hear parents talk about their children, they say the following: “Getting Straight A’s is VERY IMPORTANT if you want to get into a good college or get a good job.”
Fact or fiction?
Answer: Part fact – part fiction. Part A. Part B. Maybe even a Part C.
Here’s what I have observed to be reality:
1. There are many people in college who were NOT straight A students.
2. There are many people in college who did not get all A’s and B’s.
3. There are people in college who barely passed high school.
4. There are people who have high-level jobs who were not straight A students.
5. There are people in positions of authority who, based upon the straight A theory, should NOT be.
Although the above represents fact, not fiction, the “you must get straight A’s thinking” continues in many households. Again, I’m not against that if that’s your family’s way of doing. At the same time, there’s another totally missed ASSUMPTION in the belief that: “Getting Straight A’s is VERY IMPORTANT if you want to get into a good college or get a good job.”
What’s the assumption?
The assumption is that a “JOB” is working for someone else.
I understand having a goal of straight A’s and I support it 100 percent. Without pushing, our children have set goals to get straight A’s – and we have supported them wholeheartedly in that quest.
But my wife and I have NEVER told our children that you MUST get straight A’s in order to get a good job.
Why? Because we wouldn’t even think of thinking that it’s a good idea to think about getting a job from someone else.
Think about it. Most people who have jobs HATE their jobs. They go to work dreading their jobs. The majority of these people work for someone else, which is one of the key reasons WHY they hate their jobs.
So I am NOT going to tell my son or daughter to get straight A’s so they can get a good job from someone else.
Get straight A’s because you’d like to get straight A’s. Get straight A’s because you want to prove to yourself that you can. That’s enough of a reason.
It’s a far better reason than the reality of what your child will most likely face if you sell him the “straight A’s equals great job theory.”
Moreover, when talking to your child about good grades, why not plant a different image in his Theatre of the Mind?
Why not plant the following: “Son/daughter, the reason it’s a good idea to get good grades in school is because someday you may want to work for yourself. Someday you may want to be self-employed. You may want to open a business or go into private practice. You may want to make it BIG. You may want to hire a whole bunch of other people to work for YOU. You may want to help make the world a better place. And in order to do so, you’ll want to carry a feeling of success in every cell in your body. Getting good grades will be a reminder to you, when times are tough, that you can focus on something you really want – and you can make it happen.”
On the flip side, George, a friend of mine with five children, managed to get ALL of them off to college with “full rides.”
How’d he do it. He painted the following imagery in the Theatre of the Mind and passed it off to each child. It goes as follows:
“Son/Daughter, let me make you a deal. If your grades in school are so good that you get a scholarship to the college of your choosing, I will buy you a brand new car as your reward. Is that fair?”
Five children. Five full rides. Five brand new cars.
Yet, look at how this man framed his message to his children.
What can I tell you about this man? A lot. But I’ll keep it short.
He works for himself.
Different thinking, different pictures in your mind’s eye produce very different results.
Here endeth today’s lesson.
Be Still – and Flow,
P.S. When Nightingale-Conant contacted me about producing Theatre of the Mind they didn’t ask me what grades I got in school. Thank goodness. Whew! Make sure you order this extraordinary life-changer NOW.
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