December 1st, 2008
A few moments ago, when I was using the latrine, I nearly busted a gut when the headline for this email shot into my noggin.
I could have added one more letter to the subject line – nothing more than an ‘s’ – but it would be far less graphic and would result in far fewer people opening today’s message to see what’s on my mind.
Truth is I spent a couple hours getting my inner “organs” massaged at a clinic here in Zhengzhou, China, last night. And I went again today – TWICE.
The technique I’m being exposed to has been around for centuries even though it’s just finding me. I read about it long ago but never experienced it first hand.
The doctor working on me puts a silk cloth over my abdomen and begins to roll and knead and press on my stomach, liver, gall bladder, colon and so on. As she does so she explains that this system was passed down to her via her great great grand mother, great grandmother, grandmother and so on.
And when she does this massage I think she immediately knows more about the condition of my internal organs than an x-ray or colonoscopy will show you.
How do she know.
It’s simple. When she presses on my organs, she feels for blockages. And once they are found she immediately begins to probe deeper.
Now, if you are completely grossed out so far – let me explain that people go to this clinic with all sorts of internal difficulties. Constipation, overweight, horrible periods, enlarged prostate, stomach cramps – and so on. And within a few sessions they are alright.
Why am I going there. Well, I thought it would be interesting – and if nothing else, would give me something unusual to write about. That it has.
Let me tell you, the overall feeling of wellness you receive in one session – even if you’re not sick – is astounding. I went out halfway through the session – 1.5 hours worth – and when I opened my eyes I was seeing things from another world.
Strange as it may sound, I don’t think I was totally in my body. And the doctor didn’t bat an eye. She kept working on me while I looked at streams of light from another dimension.
When she was finished with my organs she had me roll over. Afterward she spent the next five minutes slapping me in the back and legs – I guess to put me back into my space suit.
“Hao le,” she said to let me know the session was over.
I stood up – then leaned against the table for a minute to taste the euphoria a bit longer before leaving the room.
For the next several hours I walked around in a blissed out state, thinking strange thoughts like, “I love you, man.” This would be fine if I was sitting with a good friend, but I was all by myself.
But then again – maybe not.
In my study of the Tao I learned that your internal organs are store houses for both positive and negative emotions. Your lungs, for example, house courage on the positive side and depression, grief and sadness on the negative.
Your kidneys make room for gentleness on the positive side and fear on the negative.
Your liver stores kindness as well as anger.
Your heart stores love as well as impatience.
Your stomach makes room for contentment as well as worry.
Now, before you scoff at the above – think about what happens when you go weak in the knees. You think a fearful thought, your kidneys get the signal, and then you begin to feel weak or dizzy. You may even feint. How can this be. Well, the kidneys control the strength in your legs. Don’t think this is so – then get punched in just one kidney and see how well you walk afterward.
I’ll write more on this organ fiddling stuff later – but before I do, let me interrupt myself to say one more thing, “I love you, man.”
Now I’m going swimming. The hotel I’m staying in has an Olympic size lap pool that would make Michael Phelps proud.
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